How I Met My Wife
When you've got an itch that even the dog can't seem to scratch the right way, turn to Nick Gaudio. He'll set your ass straight.
Tag: Stories
It Was a Pleasure Beating You
His father was a hardnosed man. He was also hard-bodied, hardheaded, hardworking and a touch hard of hearing. The last one was the most dangerous.
Trey Parker: Bigger, Longer & Uncut
Going down to South Park going to see if I can't... engage in sleazy ransacking, hot tub hookuping, 50-pound pussy sleeping, all in Trey Parker's house.
I’m Sorry I Fucked Your Wife
Okay, I'll admit screwing your wife in public was wrong, but completely emasculating you in the process, well, that was way out of line.
Grateful for a Dead Fable
Sometimes homeless people go above and beyond the call of duty in the hustle for a quarter. For stories like this, it's definitely a dollar.
Celebrity Encounters with Howie Day and Jeremy Piven
Everyone fantasizes about being a celebrity occasionally, but the only realistic way to brush with stardom is to crash the tour bus. Duh.
My First Girlfriend
In 6th grade, I went out with a girl named Shanna. She was outgoing and out of my league, and I was shy and a center fielder for the Blue Jays.