Mount Sinai Hospital Labor and Delivery Unit Class of January ’24 Reunion
Yeah, Mama and I have been good. Just the daily grind, trying to bang out those milestones. You know how it is. Starting to roll over, yep.
Tag: Satire
Our Committee Welcomes Fresh Ideas, as Long as They Don’t Conflict with Windowpane Smashing Festival
Holding a fair after the Windowpane Smashing Festival wouldn’t work either because, well, the windowpanes are all smashed, obviously.
An Internal Monologue as I Navigate My Office’s Open Floorplan
70 ft: Screw it, I’m just going to wave. Social norms be damned! 65 ft: Shit, he’s definitely not looking at me.
You Shouldn’t Have Messed with a Philosopher, and I’ll Prove It from First Principles
That’s right, I’d be afraid if I were you too. Afraid of having my actions held up to intellectually rigorous ethical scrutiny!
This Obituary Does Not Give a Cause of Death, but Wouldn’t You Love to Know
An avid motorcycle rider, Ben loved the freedom of the road. And before you jump to conclusions, no, that’s not how he died.
Letterboxd Reviews of “The Thing,” If the “Thing” Was the Dancing Old Man from the Six Flags Ad
★★ I’ve never seen a movie with so much dancing that’s not a musical. I’m so glad Six Flags isn’t a real place.
A Customer Service Representative Goes on a Date
That’s great, Sylvia. I’ll just make a note of that for my records. Do you mind if I change the subject while we wait for our server to arrive?
My Resolution to Quit Eating Children Is Holding Up!
I know, it’s such a cliché: “This year, no more eating children! Not even the wicked ones!” But it makes sense.
I’m a Reality Show Contestant, and I Did Come Here to Make Friends
’m going to run, jump, and climb over anything that stands between me and other people thinking good thoughts about me.
Ok, Buddy, Now You’ve Really Gone and Done It
I don't want to be bad, but I will if I have to. Wait, scratch that. I actually LOVE being bad. And guess what? To me? Being bad feels GOOD.
Tips for Toddlers to Limit Parents’ Screen Time
Be More Interesting Than Whatever Is On Their Screens: You do have one huge advantage over their screens: a direct and genetic link to their vanity.
This Year I Finally Enter the Public Domain
What exciting interpretations will these visionaries have for my scoliosis, receding hairline, and fallen arches?