10 Tips for Successfully Getting Through College
To become a cognitively engaged multitasker , you must eventually be able to drink beer, watch porn, cry, and masturbate while realizing you're not lonely.
Tag: Roommates
I’ll Never Forget You or Your Wild Accusations, But I’m Still Moving Out
What juvenile fun we had competing for the same man's attention while he was my boyfriend. A game of cat and mouse indeed, as you called it.
An Open Letter to Jay-Z and Beyoncé, My Roommates’ Neglected Cats
At night you claw at my door to let you in, hoping in vain that you might find more affection from me. It's become too much really.
Is My Roommate Having a Stroke or Is She Just Becoming a Feminist?
My annyoing-ass suitemate Pauline thinks Amy's experienced massive brain hemorrhaging. I think she's just experienced a socially-conscious awakening.
12 Passive-Aggressive Methods to Show Roommates You Disagree With Their Life Decisions
Change the Wi-Fi password to a new verse of the Sermon on the Mount every day. Repeat until they have memorized it. Then move on to the Book of Job.
What to Expect From Your Fat Stoner Roommate
Fat stoners are funny in stoner comedies and in line at Taco Bell, but they aren't good roommates. Here's what to expect if you make the terrible decision to live with one.
Dealing with a Crazy Roommate
You're going to live with a nutcase someday, and in order to preserve your sanity, you're going to need some elite training tips in order to survive this experience.
Stop Being a Virgin
Don't be sucked in to a chastity cult that treasures their virginity. A virgin is a horrible, horrible thing to be. If you are a virgin, please stop being it.
Roommates: The More You Know
Incoming freshman, you have a lot to learn about the ugly roommate situation which lies ahead. You might as well start here with the truth.
Roommate Woes
Tales of regret and despair from actual living situations with jerks, losers, slobs, and their girlfriends. Hold on to your possessions, folks.
How to Get Rid of Your Roommate
The good roommate is a rare and elusive creature, greatly outnumbered by the annoying bastard roommate. Here's how to get rid of the latter.
So You Saw Your Roommate’s Penis
Eventually, the unlucky day will come when you catch a glimpse of your roommate's goods. Are you prepared for the awkward aftermath?