On the Mass Appeal of Nipples, Match.com, and Prostate Exams
Society subscribes to a weird set of rules, and how we interpret them is even weirder. For example, why is the nipple what censorship uses as the limit for upper-torso nudity?
Tag: Relationships
Brushing Up on Relationships
Why is it that women refuse to turn off the faucet while they brush their teeth? Every one of my girlfriends has gone full blast the entire time.
iSorry, But Steve Jobs was a Dick
What Steve Jobs did was create an army of narcissistic, self-centered, self-absorbed, zombie clones by sucking their very souls into his world like Shang Tsung.
FriendsFirst.com Platonic Customer Satisfaction Survey
FriendsFirst.com, the dating website where you're taking it easy and seeing where it goes, wants to know about your online experience. Your Friends aren't making any moves, are they?
The Relationship Interview with Wesley Jansen
Wesley Jansen relaxes and provides honest responses to a relationship interviewer attempting to match him up with a female applicant. We quickly learn some men lack suitable experience.
It’s Not You, It’s Your Dog
We've been together for a year, but I can't do this anymore. Not only do I hate your retarded dog, I hate you for subjecting me to it, under the guise that he would somehow improve.
Dear Match.com, You Could Use a Guy Like Me
Dear Match.com, I think it's time I join your piece of shit website. I was put on this planet to change your ugly member stereotype forever, which is why I'm requesting a free membership.
The Four (and Only) Reasons Women Cheat
Barring the influence of roofies or chloroform, or revenge for you cheating on her/treating her like shit, these are the only four reasons a woman will cheat.
The Ex-Girlfriend Letter Template
It's difficult to have one more conversation with your lost love. So the only way to give her your last two cents is to write a letter.
So You’re Dating a MILF
Six things you need to know about MILFs before making one your girlfriend, you curious and/or loveable and/or perverted manwhore, you.
The Ashley Garmany Dating Questionnaire
In light of recent romantic failures, I've decided that every guy I meet and think I might want to go on a date with will be required to go through a screening process.
Non Sequiturs on Women and Relationships
Any argument with a female that does not end in destruction of personal property is an argument that the man wins. That's the curve on which relationship arguments are graded. <p>Women with fake breasts deserve a little bit of extra consideration, if only because they sacrificed their health and comfort to improve your scenery. </p>