Unsure if fogless sunglasses are a thing. / Expects to walk past a construction site without being catcalled.
The 1950s: He never calls you again, and you find out from his mom that he got drafted into the Korean War.
He gets excited when I feed him, but seems lukewarm when I reach important academic milestones or make advancements in my career.
How about a round of applause for the Starbucks barista who didn’t ask what else I like strong and hot on a summer afternoon.
Who faced more adversity than when Elizabeth was defrauding people based on an invention that was scientifically impossible? No one, that’s who.
Sorry, I can’t join your ragtag militia of freedom fighters, Mr. Buendía, I’m busy fighting to free my mind of institutionalized perceptions of truth and justice.
Things That I Cannot Do as a Woman in a Movie Whose Major Personality Traits Are That I’m Incredibly Petite and a Man is in Love With Me
Me, get into bed on my own? No, I simply must be picked up and tossed like a doll before unleashing these surprisingly-supple breasts!
Maybe she's born with it. Maybe she reads the whole New Yorker article instead of giving up after the third paragraph like some people I could mention.
What’s that word? Apathy? I was apathy, bro. No, wait, empathy. I was empathy. My bad ha!
Hamlet: Literally The Lion King without any of the lions, any of Africa, any majestic rock, or any Nathan Lane.
Because of #Metoo, Every Time I Meet Another Woman, We Have to Bond, Swap Harassment Stories, Hug, and Drink Each Other’s Blood
The coven of womanhood is strict. I’ve given out more hugs to passersby than I ever wanted. I also have a ton of blood floating types in my body.
For the Lost Kings "Work" remix, always say "werk" in lieu of "work." As your adamantly heterosexual boyfriend says, "It's better to twerk, girl!"