Luckily, the staff at the White House told us that things actually run a lot better when he’s not around, so they’ve agreed to lend him to us for the next few years.
Since #MeToo, most men have ceased screaming sexually explicit compliments from the open windows of their turbo-charged street shuttles.
And before you ask, you disgusting skid mark, yes, we’re sifting our dry ingredients before combining. We weren’t raised by fucking mole people.
I sent another text last night. I get that 3 AM is late, but that’s why I made all of you set your text tones to the sound of your children crying!
You ran a marathon? Impressive! How was it? I bet. The first five are always the hardest, then you move on to Ironmans.
The President shall enjoy full immunity while patting his head and rubbing his stomach at the same time.
The great reviews it got were a combination of people pleased with its cooling capabilities as well as it’s craftsmanship as a self-death machine.
"The Brexit": The UK is on a train about to crash. Unfortunately, they were on a safe track and decided to pull the switch to crash themselves.
I am the Inept Geneticist So send to me your best spitting And for you I’ll manufacture A heritage more befitting
"Drag Queen Zombies Attack!" Things are jockstraps and Jonas Brothers until suddenly, Mary Fairy and Anita Dick attack and try to eat their brains.
I offended my hosts yesterday when I criticized their dining options. I guess they don't recognize a paleo guru when they see one.
"Plunder!" (1990) Everything you've ever wanted to see plundered is plundered big time on this episode.