After four years of maintaining the highest GPA average one may have in college, I've finally been thwarted by a fucking Italian 102 class. Turns out, you can't just show up to tests for that, not knowing any Italian, and end up doing well. So, the highest grade I can achieve is a B-, getting at least a 94.5% on my final (which is strangely only worth 10% of my grade). I'm opening it up to you… since I'm going to have to retake it, I want to ask yall what sort of michief I should get into for my final.

I was thinking about getting a pack of cigarettes and smoking in the room. When he tells me to quit, I'll say something like, “IT CALMS MY FUCKING NERVES ALRIGHT I CAN'T CONCENTRATE IN THESE CONDITIONS.” And then, perhaps, light the exam off of my cigarette and leave the building screaming “fire!'

Seems sort of mundane. But fuck if I know, I feel like I'm hungover.