Love is a
(oh, who the hell really
knows what is a)
Lover that (can or
cannot break a heart)
Loves you
Uncon?(unless the)?dishes
aren't clean.
Then,
Well, really
Love is
A work in progress.
Counsel (ings into isms)
Me on what we
(I, you, whomever)
are
and I will learn
love is
You.
More Humor
We Can Change the World (We Won’t Though)
We could save the world, but there are a bunch of new shows on and a couple of cute girls coming over because I informed them that I brought over these drugs. So, nah.
Oscar Taveras in Perspective
Do not tell me that the death of Oscar Taveras puts sports or entertainment into any kind of new damn perspective, because it does not. It just sucks.
Observations Like Steamed Hipsters
I can't grow a beard so I'll never be a hipster. My genetics are once again holding me back from being cool. It's like basketball camp all over again.
The Snippets Restrain Themselves
Me: So you have a restraining order on your live-in boyfriend? How do you work that?
Billie: It's easy. He loves me. And I love him... from five hundred feet anyway.
First Date
Inside my phone are more distractions and sources of entertainment than one person could ever need. So as far as this date goes, you're in second place.
She Told Me
She told me she wanted to build a life together and then freaked out when I brought home the stem cells. Women never really know what they want.
Observations Like Kansas City Style Ebola
I really hope you're super afraid of Ebola. Because I heard that terrorists are gonna use Ebola as a biological weapon.
The Snippets Cancelled a Memorial
Me: We drove by the memorial for that Vonderrit Myers kid. Joe: We’re doing memorials for people who shoot at city cops now? Me: I guess so.
Observations Move to Russia
The same old, white American people who came out against gay marriage are the same people who tell me that if I don't like it, then I should move to Russia.