Last night was the first night I was able to watch a Cardinals game on my television here in Tampa (thanks to my digital cable MLB package). As a result, last night was Amy’s first time watching a baseball game on TV with me. I had TIVO’d it. So, after we got home from the bar, I clicked on the game and began my six to seven month habit of yelling at the screen. (By the way, if anyone in St. Louis is reading this, please tell me how in the hell Al Hrabosky is still calling games up there. If each one of his IQ points weighed three pounds, I swear, my late grandma could bench press it.)
Anyway, Amy had a good first outing. She lasted three innings (which she spent pointing out which guys she thought were cute and kissing my shoulder) and then she went to bed in a huff. The Cardinals have 160 more regular season games. Odds are, at some point in the season, Amy will get fed up and dump me.
In case you didn’t know, it is rare for one of my relationships to make it through the entire baseball season without suffering injuries. Because of this, there is currently a pool going. Feel free to guess what date Amy will leave me and I will add it to the list. The winner gets to guest write a column for me. This, naturally, makes PIC columnists ineligible to win. And while we’re talking about the rules, no entries after April 30th will be considered because I don’t want to write about this for more than a month.
Also, the winner is the one who is closest to the actual breakup date, regardless of if they are ahead of or behind the date. I hope this cleared up any confusion. I also hope Steve Hill contracts a serious disease, but what can you do?
Here’s how the pool looks so far.
The “When Will Amy Break Up with Nathan?” Pool
Court…April 21
Tony…May 18
Bunni…June 4th
Big Mike…June 23
Amy…July 4
Ashley…August 3
Kev from LA…August 26
Rob (Philly?)…Sept. 24
Chad…October 7
Ian…October 8
Curtiss…Won’t break up
So far, I think that Kev from LA and Rob from (possibly) Philly have put the most thought into this. I never miss a Cubs/Cardinals game. So calling the breakup around that time may be a smart way to go. Chad thought the post season would be a good call. And he’s got a point there, too. It is an intense time of the year. But, your decision is your own (obviously).
As a side note, I want to thank all the readers for commenting on Steve Hill’s insane plagiarism experiment. I’m glad to know that some of y’all were as pissed as some of us. That makes me feel like we’re doing something worthwhile here on PIC. And, though I can’t speak for everyone, I want to say thanks. And I want some cake and ice cream. But I guess that last one’s my problem.