I already wrote this once, but my computer deleted it.

Entertain me and answer with comments.

You're on a road trip. You get to pick three fictional movie characters from college movies. You're going to have the time of your life. Which three do you pick? Read More »

One of the most arrogant endeavors in writing is to attempt to predict the future.  Yet it seems that almost all writers do it.  In fact, just about all people do it.  For an example, take a look at the hype surrounding Tropical Storm Fay, which was predicted to hit land in the one place it did not (Tampa Bay).  In Tampa, they closed public schools and government buildings a day before a st Read More »

Welcome, children. I can guess what's on your mind. You might be asking yourself "where's the candy this creep promised?"

I'm sorry. There is no candy.

Yeah, so I lied. Get over it. Read More »

Tomorrow night, it begins again.  College football season will arrive when Ball State takes on Somebody What's it Matter Anyway University or something.  Sadly, the game has already been taken off the board in a lot of places and your local bookie is probably unlikely to give you anything less than a 45 point spread.  But what the hell ever, right?  Football is back, baby.  And with the game Read More »

"Were you raised by a group of inbred lumberjacks?!" I exclaimed to the dungaree abomination standing in front of me, as she slipped into her jean jacket.

"No," my mother cocked her head in confusion, "why do you say that?" Read More »

Hello, I'm what you'd call a gynecologist. I fix, repair, inspect, diagnose and tickle vaginas for a living. Some of my employees and co-workers call me The Pussy Doctor or just ‘pussy.' You can call me Dr. Pussy.

But let's face it. I've seen tens of thousands of vaginas in my day, and quite honestly, I'm getting a little sick and tired of them. They just don't blow my mind anymore. Read More »

K Si sent me this lovely story that doesn't quite fit anywhere else on PIC, so I thought I'd "squeeze it in" on my blog. Enjoy.

As told by "Molly" at a little bonfire/get-together this past Saturday. Read More »

The achievements of some great innovators can be traced back to the publications by which those revolutionaries were inspired. Stella McCartney grew up reading Vogue, predicting her destiny as a fashion designer. A young Warren Buffet kept his Wallstreet Journal in tow, leading him to a future of great wealth. Read More »

I shouldn't be writing this. I shouldn't be sitting here. I shouldn't even be breathing right now. But I am.

And I owe it to all of you, my friends, family, fans and casual readers.

I have so much to say right now, but I'll do my best and keep this short. Read More »

Fuck, what's that one movie, it's like on the tip of my tongue but I can't remember the fucking name, shit, fuck, it's like, fuck, there's that one girl in it who made a cameo in 7th Heaven back in like, Season Three I think, she plays a really small part of like an ice cream truck driver I think, and one of the dudes from one of the McDonald's commercials from 2003 is in it playing a drug-dealing Read More »

I'm in Chicago right now, at my sister's condo. Something's wrong with her cable box or remote or something, so her tv is stuck on NBC.  When I'm not out exploring the city, I want to unwind with some Lockup or Locked Up Abroad. But no. All we get is the Olympics. The Olympics, the news, more Olympics. Repeat of the day's Olympics. Read More »

Hey folks, it's Court, pardon the interruption.

Kc had an accident this past weekend and his friend WAM tells me that his neck and spine are injured, but that he is doing very well considering the extent of damage. Read More »

Tito:  So, the bitch gets drunk before she has to go to talk to the state attorney. 

Me:  Why?

Tito:  She said it would help my case.

Me:  Why would she think that?

Tito:  Man, if you ask that every time I tell you some dumb shit that she does, these conversations are gonna be unnecessarily long. 

Me:  Dug.

Tito:  Huh? Read More »

Of the many amateur hobbies I have, photography is one of my favorites. I realize that being forced to look at other peoples' rookie photography is the second worst thing ever, next to being forced to look at other peoples' poo. This, of course, is up for debate. Read More »

It's funny listening to American representatives condemn Russia for invading an oil-rich country without first consulting the UN.  It's like that one time growing up when my dad caught me drinking whiskey while he was drunk.  The ensuing lecture didn't really take. 

I don't know about you, but I was just shocked to learn that China's government could be less than honest about its representat Read More »