My Acceptance Speech After Answering One Question Correctly at Bar Trivia
I am here to keep the small talk alive because everyone else is so locked in that they forget how to socialize.
I am here to keep the small talk alive because everyone else is so locked in that they forget how to socialize.
When I heard I would be given the honor of introducing tonight’s penultimate speaker, you could imagine my excitement.
If we look back to the mistakes, the failures, the death mask grimaces of the asphyxiated faces we’ve left behind, then we’ll never move on.
That’s where SquareSpace comes in. For just nine score and nine cents, you can receive six months’ subscription, plus a free domain name.
Seeing you both now, I think we will sue. Sorry—I think we will. SUE, and Noah, you are clearly blessed.
We cannot hallow—this ground, except of course by playing a consciousness-altering stream of Christmas songs in November and December without pause.
1975 — Gerald Ford, cognizant of new requirements to look good on TV, overdoes his makeup and inadvertently wins an episode of RuPaul's Drag Race.
I wish I had said that. Instead, I broke into an ugly cry and stumbled from the room, having jammed a big toe on the life-sized skeleton model.
First off, I would like to thank the Ridge Hill Community Soccer organization for re…
Standing on his tiptoes, he craned over their hunched heads, hoping to get a glimpse of the candidates.
When finally he stepped out onto the moon, he spoke those iconic first words: "Look what I did.... all by myself… with no one's help."
The first step, of course, is to avoid mirrors. This is essential if you are to eliminate the risk of looking yourself in the eye.