Satire | Page 6 | Points in Case

Tag: Satire

But, if I could offer one tiny suggestion, while you sound amazing, the song choice doesn’t show off your full potential.

Let me stop you. That’s not mold. That’s ambiance. That’s character. That’s the sort of authentic, rustic charm people pay top dollar for.

Ya'll must be nuttier than a squirrel's mouth to think you can set up establishments WITHOUT proper certification and licenses.

First, remember what you named the file. “Invention idea: the wheel”? “Wheel stuff”? “Wheel deets”? Maybe just “wheel”?

Can’t you see how clean my oven is? How filed my taxes are? How very walked my dog is? And yet, the thing is still not done.

By birth order or circumstantial trauma, you have been designated as the emotional backbone of the household.

Episode 2: After further inquiry we’ve learned that Quentin McCasey is part of an avid subculture of "Indoor Bird Watchers."

CAUTION: I’ve killed before and I’ll kill again. You’re probably thinking: “Why would a soft, soft teddy bear kill a baby?"

WELL GUESS THEY CAUGHT ME. GREAT JOB. BECAUSE I PUT MY BLOOD SWEAT AND TEARS. OH GOD SO MANY FUCKING TEARS INTO THIS DRINK.

These here are magic coins that live inside yer lightning box, protected by some new-fangled doohickey called a “blockchain.”

$432.01 - Limbo Beach Bar. Reason: We definitely thought we’d be closing some deals by shouting “Drinks on us!” We were wrong. Bummer.

O Lord, I called upon the sacred number, as it was written on the back of my card.