Satire | Page 123 | Points in Case

Tag: Satire

You shall meet Ra, the Supreme God of the Sun and Creator of All Tan Lines. He will teach thee how to avoid straining thy intervertebral joints.

Whatever the establishment was, I had zero inkling. Whatever the black circle represented, I was stirred to find out.

I know I told you no animal print this year, but boy am I glad you didn't listen! Again. For the third year in a row.

I think the lesson is: the stimulus check isn't about being able to afford basic necessities. It's about reconnecting with a part of myself I lost.

Just like you, with some strategic bright lights and a huge painted-on smile, I make it look like everything is peachy keen.

I don't need nothin' special or luxurious. I am just a regular guy with simple tastes and One Dollar rent.

The thank-you note was from Whiskers, Sam Meowliot, and Purrt Russell. They also showed their gratitude by leaving some fur in the cookies.

I used to think that I was important, that I was original. But I am just an imitation. I’m the adornment, not the adorned.

When I hear this song, I remember how Krakenfuss kept her grocery store open on Christmas Eve. She was the richest person in town and the meanest.

I'm like: "Not today, Covid--I'm in a pod." And I'm lucky because everyone in it is super careful, like me.

We cannot hallow—this ground, except of course by playing a consciousness-altering stream of Christmas songs in November and December without pause.

We were trying to get to Uranus, and had mistaken your planet for our intended destination. So we started calling you bipeds "Uranuses."