‘Twas the Night Before Inauguration
The coffers were hung by Big Business with care, in hopes that St. Donald Trump soon would be there.
Tag: Presidents
I Guess I’m Going to the Inauguration By Myself Again This Year
Asking a girl to the inauguration is a rite of passage for teens, but everybody says they're going "as a group" this year, and I can't find a stupid date.
Time is Running Out for Obama to Implement Sharia Law
Constitutional scholars are already working to find loopholes so President Trump can reverse all impending evil jihadist programs.
A Transcript from the New York Times Interview with President-Elect Trump About a Photograph of a Shoe
Join The New York Times and President-elect Trump to find out once and for all if this is a photograph of a shoe.
12 Ways to Talk Your Mom Down From the Ledge When the Hottest President Ever Leaves Office
I don't know about you guys, but my mom is heartbroken over this hottie's departure. Here's how to help mothers everywhere deal.
A High School Junior Summarizes Marbury v. Madison for Her Fellow Millennials
This bat-crap crazy, totes-negative aura around the election of 1800 was what made the whole Marbury v. Madison Supreme Court shiz-nit really hit the fiz-zan.
Make America England Again
Independence was cool for a while, but we're young adults now. And what do young adults do these days? They move home to live with their parents!
BREAKING NEWS: Donald Trump’s Health Records Revealed
An unaltered leak of presidential candidate Donald Trump's most recent health evaluation. The information has been transposed unaltered.
Donald Trump Rates Horror Movie Villains As He Would Rate Women
The Donald unleashes his uncompromising peculiarity upon your favorite childhood horror film villains.
PIC Poll: Who Won the Second Presidential Debate?
Points in Case polled 285 online participants immediately following tonight's townhall presidential debate in St. Louis. The results are surprising.
The First Draft of Melania Trump’s Convention Speech
Donald Trump believes that people will forget what you’ve said, they’ll forget what you did, but they won’t forget a 1,000 mile border wall. You love this man, and so do I.
Dear Overlord Pence, Of Uterus-Controlling Indiana
You signed a bill backing legislation to effectively control the uteruses (uteri?) of all Indianan women. That means all the women will go to neighboring Iowa now.