Soon I'll be eliminating all life on Earth, and there's nothing I can do to change course unfortunately. Any questions?
In my haste to create a flesh-and-blood Dilbert, I took a few shortcuts which, in retrospect, were pretty big mistakes.
The Donald unleashes his uncompromising peculiarity upon your favorite childhood horror film villains.
A terrified young virgin will be forcibly restrained while her heart is ripped, still beating, out of her chest, while she endures an unimaginably gruesome demise!
Jessica was just a normal, everyday HR Rep with everything going for her: a nice place, a great boyfriend, and a good job. That is, until she woke up ALONE.
These are the network TV shows this fall that beg the question, "Are these network executives planning to seek professional help for their drug problems?"
Baby shower timing is important. Too late and Rosemary may be dead after the Antichrist rips out of her stomach. Too soon and she'll have no baby bump to sport!
It's been another year living with severe arachnophobia. After an in-class incident with a spider, I realized that they are now personally fucking with my education.
AMC made a show about competitive taxidermy. Which means they will literally accept any show in the world. So here are my pitches for their next fall lineup.
Sometimes a movie's terror creates a vortex of fear that spins you until the force sends you flying off into the depths of the cold, lifeless abyss. Fuckin' shit's scary.
It may never be a good haircut but at least it's cheap and involves hair getting cut. That is, if you can make it through all the trials and tribulations of the waiting room.
When I think of food, I don't think of a rectangular chunk that looks like a gargoyle with a square asshole shit it out. Or a meal that looks like a bunch of scabs swimming in a puddle of whale semen.