College | Page 10 | Points in Case

Tag: College

Dad’s old tennis sneakers: You dated him in college when he wore these sneakers and you seemed to like them just fine back then.

Oh my god, I literally have nothing to put on my college applications. Why did you let me quit cross country?

Someone wearing acid wash jeans or an acid wash denim mini skirt and a Tufts sweatshirt --- 20 points, Those Reeboks with the Velcro --- 25 points

For years you’ve trusted me as the man/peanut hybrid from uncertain origins who loved one thing and one thing alone: selling Planter’s Peanuts.

Gimme a classroom full of second-string lacrosse players who are thirsty for validation---this mama’s fixin’ to teach creative writing!

The eggheads at NASA say that last year was the fourth hottest on record, and yet a polar vortex of Arctic proportions has descended upon my bedroom.

Mixed up bodies of water, and when your friend from out of town visited, confidently pointed towards Hoboken and said, “that’s Brooklyn over there?”

I still remember that first taste, the delicious mouth-feel of the words, the surprising burn as they went down.

At satisfying video school, I got to nerd out with fellow satisfying video geeks over the differences in crunch between Kinetic Sand and Madmattr.

I don’t fix my issues, but I hide them under a thin sheet of functionality that I quickly whip off with the flair of a flamboyant Las Vegas magician.

Now I heard you’re even talking about me in therapy? I was hoping you’d move on by now, since you’re in your mid-thirties and all.

Dear Joan, I looked up your name on LinkedIn---because that’s how much I care about this job. I seriously need you to hire me.