I changed my eye color to vibrant green… the actual color name on the eye-dye box says “sexual forest” which is odd, because to me it's more of an “evergreen erection” Either way it's a major CHARM ALARM!

Actually if you haven't noticed, I shaved down to a handlebar ‘stache. This is a win-win situation for me. I am more man than I was before. The ladies that do like it, will quiver in their panties, resonating a perfect V# if you know what i'm saying. We will make beautiful music. The ladies that hate it, have to give me props for the humor. After all, I will probably give it two weeks before i start growing it out again. So basically just decide what facet of my attraction you like most and get back to me. Is it the life and laughter that I exude through every pore, disarming your shell of hurt and allowing you to open up to my wondrous self, or is it the raw, macho manliness veiling an insecurity complex that you're going to try to fix through various therapies involving your mouth.

I really am going to dye my eyes though… tear-colored. What lady can resist that?

And now a quick joke...

Has 2020 been wearing its Halloween costume all year?