Stop whatever the hell it is you think you're doing right now because this is freaking the most important thing to happen to PIC since the site was created in the first place.  Nothing PIC has ever been or done can compare to the majesty you're about to witness.

The Snippets and the Impure Tour

You see that cover?  Man, that is a beautiful cover.  That cover was created by one Shane Ryan Simmons, who happens to be a badass artist and professional art dude.  So you know we're talking about excellence.  And that is excellence to the abstract!

Can you tell I'm a little pumped?

This, as you may or may not know, is my long-awaited-by-some and unknown-to-many book which just arrived yesterday and is perfect in almost every way (I deliberately left a Court Sullivan typo in, you know, ‘cause he's an editor).  And you should definitely buy it because if you don't, you will be so uncool that years from now, when I'm in jail for triple homicide and PIC is bigger than Yahoo!, you will wish you had jumped on the bandwagon and had the original version of my fine ass book, which blows away all other attempts at drug humor, snappy dialogue and pun-filled forwards.

Now, in this tough economy, you may be wanting a few more reasons why you should click on this link and shell out cash for The Snippets and the Impure Tour.

First, if you like the snippets, you will absolutely love this book.  One of the things that makes the snippets so occasionally kick ass is that they are taken from real life.  And sometimes real life will make you lose your excrement.  Well, the snippets in this book are taken from my whole life, not just the week before I wrote them.  These are the greatest snippets from my life.  Some of these even go back to high school.  Fucking high school, people!  You try remembering the funniest exchanges you had in high school.  I used some serious neurons to write this book.

Second, there is a very true to life story in this book about a kid who followed the Grateful Dead for a good chunk of one summer the year before the band broke up due to the death of lead singer, Jerry Garcia.  Many may not believe this, but said kid had a real good time, made a good chunk of change and learned some valuable lessons.  Let me tell you something: there is nothing like reality-truth left unsaid-a cornball wicked world: The Grateful Dead.  On a semi-related note, drugs are bad.

Third, I've taken the economy into consideration here folks.  If you can't afford the book itself, you can download it for a mere six bucks.  If you've been reading me for longer than a couple of months and don't think I'm worth six bucks, then fuck you and go to another site.  And I hate your shirt.  And you're ugly.

Fourth, and I know this shouldn't be taken into consideration because it's not your problem, but between my gambling debts and legal fees… well, let's just say I could use the money. 

Finally, the foreword in this book is written by Court Sullivan and the entire thing was edited by David Nelson.  This book is living proof of what PIC can accomplish when we work as a team-a drunken fool team, sure.  But still a team.

Also, and not for nothing, but if you download or purchase a copy of the self-proclaimed best independently published work of fiction in America, I swear your life will be better (assuming you read the thing).  Because more than anything, I'm here to help.  And more than anything I've written, this book offers help.

Anyway, just buy the damn thing.  We'll both be glad you did.

Buy The Snippets and the Impure Tour here!

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