We’re Recruiting for Our Libertarian Utopia!
We had a few incidents in which some misused their legally acquired, weaponized smallpox strains, but that's a small price to pay for freedom.
We had a few incidents in which some misused their legally acquired, weaponized smallpox strains, but that's a small price to pay for freedom.
Dad Bod Mints: Like the popular “Thin Mints,” but thicker, and with a little bit of hair.
Now that I know there are more of us, maybe we can form a community. We kiss our parents on the lips together, and they will gently kiss us back.
We then cut to the same location to view the disturbing spectacle of grotesque businessmen carving up our dead Bill and eating him for supper.
It’s a commitment, most football teams have several practices a week. As a single parent, I can’t make that work. Also my son is made of glass.
The only thing that stops a bad kid with a dream is a good fully grown adult with a Twitter account. Please heed these social media tips.
Wheat Grass: You are health conscious and enjoy taste bud masochism. Scotch: You are a lawyer and you’ve been to 13% of your son’s baseball games.
This week’s tarantula would have proven less challenging if we had found it straight away, rather than four hours later during Tina’s sleepover.
Somebody will watch in confusion as a frustrated Jim Carrey thrusts his torso to explain where the parking garage’s car elevator will go.
Good manners are expected at all times. That means always saying “please,” “thank you,” and “our mother made a terrible mistake not baptizing us.”
Our Economy Basic passengers are seated in a section of the plane teeming with luxury-hungry wolves, starving for cherished Basic ticket-holders.
"But look after I beat the display game, I found my kid and bought an entire shelf of Legos out of guilt. Okay?" ---Victor Andrade (Wichita, KS)