A Letter to Willy Wonka from Mrs. Bucket
My son only talks about candy lately, as though there is nothing more to running a business than coming up with colorful and dangerous food for kids.
My son only talks about candy lately, as though there is nothing more to running a business than coming up with colorful and dangerous food for kids.
Michael and LeBron do not like mountain climbing. They’re just not any good at it. Conversely, Baby Goat can scale a mountain like nothing.
Earn points when you accidentally blow through a stop sign and understand that people of color could not laugh with the police officer about it.
The big boy used his new moon to rock nuky cappos, support beezies, and pushed a hard line throughout the Middle E-Town and beyond.
First, you come for my toy guns. What’s next? Marshmallow shooters, finger guns, fingers themselves?! After you already got my nose? Never again!
While our aesthetic up until about mid-2016 was "cozy cabin," our current aesthetic is more like "amicably abandoned sanitarium."
I wasn’t just enjoying, but empathizing with contestants on The Bachelor. I shut it off and recollected my ironic self over a lukewarm Zima.
"Catch” implies the game will be like the original, instead of my better idea for an abstinence-focused game. The slogan should mention doing chores.
I like the idea of burying it next to a tree. But since we can’t even keep the racoons and possums out of the compost bin, that’s not happening.
As an upstanding member of this community, I hope you’ll believe me that I am, definitively, a human flesh man, and not any kind of insect homunculus.
Did it even occur to me to check in with my dad after his heart surgery? No, because that would have meant shutting the door on the Muse, and that is just selfish.
Adopting the moniker Steg For More, Larsson’s first album produced the song “Leggo my Steggo,” which hit #5 on the Australian Billboard Top 100.