Court Sullivan just used my shower for the second time in two days. I feel so special.

You haven’t really gotten the most you can get out of until you’ve seen PIC editor Court Sullivan put PIC featured writer, Michael Curtiss in a choke hold. I mean that.

Everyone loves The Cracker Barrel. (This is an inside joke between the three of us, and usually I don’t exclude my audience, but this one was too much. Sorry, guys.)

Thus far Court has seen me sing improvisational blues, drink heavily and sell drugs. Fortunately for me, he does not judge. He knits. (Seriously, you should see the sweater he brought me.)

And, because he’s here, and we’re not drunk enough to go to breakfast, and I am bankrupt of ideas, I am handing the proverbial microphone to the man in charge (he claims he can’t write drunk; but we all know that’s a lie).

Nate lives the truth. Everything you read about this guy is exactly the same in person. I don’t think I’ve ever met someone who can mimic themselves on paper so accurately. Alas, that just means I’ve had plenty of reasons to drink and laugh over the last few days.

And then there’s Mike Curtiss. Great guy. Totally lives up to his stories as well. However, he was totally in need of a beating the other night. Chokehold works pretty well. Nothing like a little WWE action to get things going. You know what I’m saying, right Nelson? (Full Nelson, not half.)

Just to give you an idea of how things really work around here (Tampa, FL), Nate propositioned a bartender girl for sex the other night under the premise that she would want to fuck him because she was the THIRD IN LINE ON HIS LIST OF ON-A-BREAK-GIRLS-I-CAN-NOW-FUCK. She said no. But that’s ok, you swing a 100 times and you’re bound to hit a homerun once, right? Ah, baseball, you gotta hate it.

Saturdays and Sundays are all about segueing (I have no idea how the F you spell that btw). You get shit-faced on Friday and then you wake up on Saturday hoping to God that there’s some beer in the refrigerator so you can keep what little of a buzz you have leftover, going. And guess what? We have beer left. It’s Strongbow, so it’s not exactly a “real man’s” beer, but you know what? Fuck you, I’m drunk, and I still know how to use my penis.

And now you can see why the website is as quality as it is. Finding out that Court is in charge of this thing is like going on a cruise and finding out that your Captain is Jack Daniels. And now, because he’s the boss, he has to fucking add something.

Why do I feel special working for The Nate Way? I could delete this entire blog right now if I wanted.