I Am So Sorry, Girl
A free form poetry apology to that 'special' girl you barely knew, but had to break it off with. Parting is such sarcastic sorrow.
Tag: Observations
The Mind of a Single Guy
Find out what goes through the average single guy's mind during the day... start to finish, completely uncensored.
Do NOT Air This Sitcom
Twelve rules for avoiding primetime pilot disaster, in spite of FOX's enthusiasm for your 1970's identical twin mixup drama starring Pepsi.
Greatest Snow Day Activities
When the harshness of winter finally convinces your college to close down, how will you spend the day? Whatever you do, please add alcohol.
School Spirit: My Anti-Drug
A fresh, investigative look at the importance of pursuing school spirit. And the inherent difficulties in achieving it.
Safety is the New Recklessness
Maximizing your fun-to-danger ratio requires a bit of careful planning. Just remember: there's always safety in numbers of the opposite sex.
Just Say No to Molly
Please don't ignore the wisdom of experienced college cleaning staff. Because when it comes to brothels, they know exactly which type of ecstasy to avoid.
The Great Roommate Sex Escape
When your roommate's doin' the nasty with some ugly, and you're sober enough to hear it, it's time to evacuate. Know your emergency exit routes.
Live Like It’s Rivalry Weekend (Michigan/Ohio State Football)
There's nothing more intense than an age-old rivalry like Michigan/Ohio State football. Just try to avoid the cops in riot gear.
The Real World DOES Suck
What is the world outside the college bubble really like? Let's just say the 'realness' sets in hard after a week of corporate paperclip-counting.
Relationship Endings for Beginners
If you thought it was hard to find the right words to say DURING a relationship, try ENDING one on your terms. Not so easy my friend.
My Post-Pubescent Pontification
Shaving your pubic hair is just wrong! It's unnatural, weird, and quite emasculating. Wait, did somebody say deep throat? *Buzzzzzzz*