<p><img src="/files/u46/Easter_Bunny_in_jumpsuit.gif" alt="" width="386" height="650" /> </p><p>Hey gang, it's audience participation time! You get to answer my questions with stories and anecdotes. Fill in the comment box and tell me your deepest, darkest, chocolate-y secrets.</p>
<p>Hey gang, sorry I haven't been writing my usual Weekly Questions bit. I'm sure your days have been unfulfilled for a while. So I'll try to ask extra-good questions. Remember, it's audience participation time. Just leave a comment to answer these questions. And do it honestly, because I'll know if you're cheating.</p>
<p><img src="/files/u46/saint_paddy.jpg" alt="" width="400" height="300" /> </p><p>On this joyous Irish saint day, if you want to impress people (future sexual partners) with your knowledge instead of your drinking prowess, here are some fun facts about American bars, Saint Paddy's and Irish stuff. So enjoy, kind readers.</p><p>It's true, green beer causes you to be gaytarded. </p>
<p><img src="/files/u46/invisible_man.jpg" alt="The Invisible Man" width="400" height="400" /></p><p>As I walked down the street today I saw a sign in a furniture store or maybe a coffee shop (either or, the place was empty) that said "Invisible Man Reading." </p>
<p><img src="/files/u46/red_rocket.jpg" alt="" width="400" height="550" /> </p><p>Gang, I just got off the phone with my tattoo artist Adam Hays who had some bad news. Buddha, another tattooist, just lost his eldest daughter to senseless violence. </p>
<p><img src="/files/u46/kc___high.jpg" alt="" width="400" height="300" /> </p><p>A few of my fellow writers like to write after drinking. Sometimes my best stuff comes after I'm really hungover. I definitely don't suggest this as it can kill brain cells and you can end up waking up next to some awkward people. </p>
<p><img src="/files/u46/jackalope_rider.jpg" alt="" width="250" height="249" /><img alt="" /> </p><p>Happy Ash Wednesday everybody. I hope you all figured out the types of jelly beans the Easter Bunny will bring you in forty days. While you're thinking, answer some questions! </p>
<p><img src="/files/u46/shark_attack.jpg" alt="" width="400" height="300" /> </p><p>I drank mezcal with a scorpion in the bottle last night and almost ordered tacos de chapulines (grasshopper tacos). 1A. What's the grossest thing you've ever eaten? 1B. What's the nastiest thing you've ever drank? 1C. What's the baddest ass thing you've ever eaten or drank?</p>
<p><img src="/files/u46/octopus.jpg" alt="" width="400" height="340" /> </p><p>I've really been slacking on weekly questions. I've been forced to deal with my own life questions: how will I find another job in this economy, where should I move next and why do I base a country's merit on its cheap food choices in my neighborhood (Vietnam is good, France is bad). </p>
<p>I learned how to do MS Paint. Here's my first drawing. Click on it to make it bigger. (Yes, this is about as good as my art gets.) </p><p><img src="/files/u46/boob_drawing_0.jpg" alt="" width="400" height="250" /> </p>
<p>It's Wednesday again, and that means Burger King Whoppers used to be $.99! It also means you get a new round of questions from your life-trivia master...ME! Read, think and then answer. Your grades will come in the mail in about three-to-four weeks.</p>
<p>Read the questions, answer them creatively as comments. Put some thought into your answers. Or just make up random shit. </p>