Prince Percy: "General Haggis, lovely rousing words, but I was wondering if I might also have a word with our men before the glorious fight..."
History has its share of weird bans that simply wouldn't have many supporters today, including bans on chess, coffee, tattoos, and Christmas.
BuzzFeed use the beaten-horse style of nostalgic prose so predictably and effectively, that we've already written an excerpt of what you'll see in 2034.
You might have guessed that I am still without a husband. Which is why I have established an online profile in search of dating courtship.
Thomas Edison exuded hatred, greed, and asshattery like a dead, bloated walrus exudes postmortem gas buildups. That is to say, constantly, putridly, and smellingly.
Poetry is the lazy writer's way to express oneself. No wonder it's the perfect starter kit to get you laid! Prepare to be lauded as a genius, both in and out of bed.
Sometimes a movie's terror creates a vortex of fear that spins you until the force sends you flying off into the depths of the cold, lifeless abyss. Fuckin' shit's scary.
Children. There's the siren. You know the routine. Under your desks! Be careful. The snake got loose again. Old Rattley is on the floor somewhere and bitin' mad.
Emma Watson said in interviews that she prefers Twilight because "it is more for girls and stuff." Similarly, Robert Pattinson lived entirely on Kellogg's Frosted Flakes to achieve his sparkly effect in Twilight.
It's well known that FBI director J. Edgar Hoover was a flaming, cross-dressing closet queen with an obsession for large male appendages. Here's the rest of Hoover's strange story.
Florida has provided the world with jerk-off sports teams, early bird specials, hurricanes, and plenty of illegal Cubans. Unfortunately, the adult film "Hung Chad" was never made.
I feel the need to dispel the misconceptions about the theme of what was once my favorite John Denver song and currently the state that I call home. Please enjoy a basic history of the great state of West Virginia.