The world may be coming around to my way of thinking. And I'm fucking scared.

This article here details how His Coreness Ron Paul is currently influencing some of our government officials to actually, you know, do their freaking jobs and uphold the constitution of the United States, which is a groundbreaking idea first initiated before the invention of the goddamn cotton gin.

And this poll here shows how more and more Americans are starting to come to terms with the likely idea that the largest influence on climate change could be natural and not the emissions of cars and planes. Now, I never really wrote about my feelings on this because the jury is most definitely still out here, but I did once write that believing one politician with an agenda is stupid when there are like four hundred global climate studies being done by like one thousand global climate scientists whose only agenda is finding out the truth about the world we live in. So I can't say for sure that global warming is or is not occurring (or, if it is occurring, is or is not man made) but I can say that I'll listen to a mechanic about the validity of replacing my car before I'll listen to a car salesman's opinion on the subject. (And yes, that metaphor was a bit of a reach but I'm kicking off some rust here people.)

And this article here shows that pole dancing is definitely and without a doubt an art form and as such can be subsidized with tax dollars. I never explicitly wrote that either, but I guess the theme of many of my earlier pieces on this site could be summed up with the sentence: God bless strippers. So there's that.

And now that some people are acknowledging that CO2 may not be a pollutant, that the government should not be in charge of controlling the money supply and that strippers are indeed participating in something as grand and as glorious as the expression of the written word, well I feel it is my place to give y'all some predictions for what may come here in the latter half of 2009. The following will probably not be funny.

I believe that gas/oil prices, food prices and mineral/metal prices will all increase steadily through 2009 as demand once again increases in China and India and the proliferation of excessive dollar-printing devalues our currency here in America. The stock market may improve (the stock market is not, no matter what anyone tells you, indicative of the American economy as all economies are now global and essentially tied together) but layoffs will continue thanks to a decrease in tax havens for US companies. And though government-created spending projects may temporarily create jobs, robbing the taxpayer to pay the employee does nothing to sustain growth and essentially prolongs fiscal pain. I guess what I'm saying is that country wide, inflation will be over 10% before December. I was thinking about getting a roommate anyway.

I believe that foreign investors and banks from countries such as China, India and Saudi Arabia will emerge as the new rulers of the American banking industry. With bond yields low and bond prices high, the spread (difference between price paid and priced received, i.e. the kickback) is profitable to investors willing and capable of loaning long term. Foreign countries with heavy commodities assets will be in better shape to lend long term than will American banks and, much like in the ‘80s when Japan stepped in, we will have a bunch of countries willing to purchase chunks of the American dream en masse. I always wanted to learn Mandarin anyway.

I believe that the movement to nationalize the banks and the auto industry will succeed, but will be met with a rebellion the likes of which the American populace has not seen since the ‘60s. Essentially, Americans will wake up and realize that the Federal Reserve has more power over their day-to-day lives than does the President and his cronies, and as such, the forces that create inflation and run the money supply are essentially taxing us without representing us. This is totally cool because I will need some rallies and stuff to go to while I'm unemployed and my new roommate is banging his girlfriend on my couch.

Also, I'm pretty sure the tube top is coming back and I totally couldn't be more stoked.

Go America! Go!