Attention Tenants: The Water Will Be Shut off Tomorrow from 8-10 and Also I Can Hear You Having Sex
Not to be a prude, but when you’re loud late at night it keeps me awake when I’m trying to sleep.
Matt Payton used to perform stand up comedy when that still existed in Los Angeles, now he waits for the flames to engulf us all. He has performed at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival, Out of Bounds Comedy Festival, Flyover Comedy Festival and the Cleveland Comedy Festival. His work has appeared in McSweeney's, Points In Case, Splitsider and The Weekly Humorist. He really enjoys writing bios and doesn't at all fret about them.
Not to be a prude, but when you’re loud late at night it keeps me awake when I’m trying to sleep.
Above The Rim: No one gets a scholarship to Georgetown, where many hookups can take place, because the grounds have been converted to a WeWork space.
I don’t know if they teach conflict resolution in that school of yours these days, but I sure could use some relationship advice.
While you’re on your way to vote why not stop for a bite to eat? Hildie’s Roadside Café is pretty close to your polling place.
Are you happy with the cleanliness of your carpets even with an assistant that doesn’t ask visitors to wipe their feet when they come in?
Strap your child in tight: no one wants to be jostled in the helicopter mid-air, even if it's a short ride from the Upper East Side to the Hamptons.