Now, I'm all for Vaughn bringing his movies to Chicago. The studios employ
the locals, there is the rare Hollywood-esque premiere in the city, and what
actor hasn’t made the rent by being an extra for one of his movies? I know I
have, but as much as Vaughn loves to brag about
how much he loves Chicago, and represents the North Side in only a way one
who grew up here would know how to do, it kind of pisses me off that he grew up
in Lake Forest. Support the Bears, be a Cubs fan, use the city as a backdrop of
every movie you make, but don’t deny the fact that you’re from a local suburb.
"I went in to Fred Claus expecting Swingers
with a bunch of Christmas decorations."
I could go into how he didn’t have
to take public transportation to and from school, daily avoiding the
cross-eyed preaching Jesus guy who carried a concealed weapon. Or
waiting in line at the only clean bowling alley on the North Side
for two hours for a lane, only to hear your name called and realize
you can’t even bowl a whole game because your car insurance expires
at the city’s 11pm curfew. But the bottom line is, Vince, stop
fronting; you’re from a land of gated communities and trees, where
creepy men jack off in their own 5-bedroom homes, not jizz all over
your garbage cans in the alleyway.
I don’t deny that my DVD collection holds all of his classics: Wedding
Crashers, Old School, and of course Swingers. What it doesn’t
contain are his feeble attempts to be a serious actor. He’s so appealing just
acting like himself in most of his flicks that when you stick him in a
drama, like the remake of Psycho, it’s impossible to take the former
playa seriously—“It’s money, baby!”—when he’s donning a wig and granny dress.
Which brings me to my point about Fred Claus, which I watched last
night with my college roommate and her family (part of the movie was filmed on
her street in the city, so it was quite a production seating everyone at the
movie theater). I must say, I went in there expecting Swingers with a
bunch of Christmas decorations, and left filled with holiday cheer…thanks to the
other big name actors and the fat chubby child Santa in the beginning, certainly
not Vince playing Vince, only named Fred.
Sure the evil Kevin Spacey could have replaced the elves with
cheap Mexican immigrant labor, but that was too unrealistic since most
Mexicans are not partial to snow, and it’s widely known that only vodka is
exported to the South Pole, not tequila. And in my opinion, Vaughn’s love
interest in reality would have chosen the battered heart Denny DuKett guy from
Grey’s Anatomy over Vince’s ever-growing extensive collection of trash bags
under his eyes. Sure, it looks like he’s snorted a stocking full of cocaine in
every scene, but we’re paying to hear him say, “Let’s have some fun, make some
bad decisions.” And for some reason we can’t resist it.
