Reluctantly, I agreed to take care of my mother’s cat while she was out of town. Being a lover of all animals, you'd think I'd have been excited - but you'd be mistaken.
When I was a kid, the mall was a great place, filled with wonder and the possibility of blowjobs. What exists now is a crippled version of it's old glory.
Mr. Cook, I can no longer sit back while your egregious blunders defame the good name of those around you. Especially the illustrious Dennis Rodman.
Since by my estimate the average person has the intelligence of salad dressing, it shouldn't be a shock to see people do stupid things. But it never fails.
The American Dream isn't as far off as you think. Just stick to slothfulness and the unearned judgment of others - that’s our generation’s legacy.