When, in the course of human events, one deems it necessary to form ties with another, then in due process a union shall be formed. But not without rules.
The study of thermodynamics tells us that the opposite of hot is cool. Popping one's collar significantly blocks the sun and not the cock.
The legendary E. Mike has returned from faraway lands. He thanks you for filling his inbox, but he can't stay and cuddle. You know how it is.
Moving is a challenging, emotional journey of one's mind and soul. Box up your heavy heart, and make your friends carry it.
Now, for my final trick, I will make thousands of American soldiers disappear. But first, is that a quarter behind your ear? I need that.
To fully understand your current love life, you must start by analyzing the crissed-crossed crushes of your childhood friends.
Twilight is falling on your college career. Should you reminisce about the memories of the past 4 to 6 years or drink until you forget them?
With the current state of things, our culture is at a loss for more than just a great writer. We could all use a little Kurt Vonnegut in us.
Wait a minute, this isn't Pleasuretown! Girl, where are you taking us? I knew I shouldn't have let you navigate this relationship.
Tough Luck, Saddam, looks like your noose is cooked. But hey, speaking of funny-sounding foreigners, have you seen Borat?
The Holidays are all about catching women on your tongue like snowflakes. If you don't like what you got, just return it.
You may find yourself over your head when the red tide flows in. But come hell or high water, you've got to show her how much you care.