Updates from Your Local Library Regarding Your Overdue Book
If you still need more time, we get it. Everyone reads at their own pace, but you must be at least halfway through, right?
Comedy Writing
I, the Sitcom Laugh Track, Am Ready to Be Considered for Dramatic Roles
I studied Strasberg with Laura Dern. I, too, was in the original Jurassic Park before Steven Spielberg edited me out.
I May Be a Worm and I May Be Tantalizing, But Trust Me, Trout, You Don’t Want to Eat Me
Haven’t you noticed your friends and family disappearing? It never once crossed your mind to file a missing fish report?
Hurry! For a Limited Time Only, YOU Could Be the Next Owner of Our Exclusive Family Heirloom Ring!
Act now to receive a lifetime of resentment from the rest of our family.
Are You Taking a Family Photo or Undergoing a Colonoscopy?
- There’s no chance you’ll walk away with a flattering photo. - You don’t know what to do with your arms.
Childhood Dreams, Revised for Adulthood
Childhood Dream: Live in a mansion. Adult Revision: Live next door to someone who doesn’t own a leaf blower.