A Journalistic Piece About Oral Sex in a Men’s Bathroom
While taking a dump in the library bathroom at the University of Cincinnati, I took the time to read everything written on the wall.
Tag: Shotguns for Everyone!
Fuck Olympic Swimming
Seriously. I know this is a little late in all, but I still think about it on a daily basis. I was a swimmer for a good chunk of my life and still swim to stay in shape. But every four years I have to listen to people preach to me like they know something about swimming. News flash, you don't know shit about swimming from watching a 1 minute race, or listening to announcers.
The American Dream
Dad: You sure you're not working too much?<br />Me: I only worked 40 hours and went to 18 hours worth of class.<br />Dad: That's not too much?<br />Me: Just living the American Dream I guess.<br />
The High Life
<p>So when there is nothing to do in the fine suburbs of Cincinnati, we play dice in the alleys behind my friends house. My friend was blessed and born into a rich family, unlike the rest of us who were born into middle class. So the alley of choice was between his house and his neighbors, which was more of an alley than a driveway. So that's what we do.
This is to All the Hippies Out There
<p>I hate you, which creates terrible conflict in my life, because I love smoking pot. My favorite thing about smoking pot is the conversations that follow.