After a semester of keg stands and Taco Bell free-for-alls, you are completely unprepared for the final exam. You have but one choice left: find someone to cheat off of.
I've come to the conclusion that apart from the 'that shit can't happen' scientific aspect, a superhero could never make it in 2011, thanks to technology and Lady Gaga.
No matter how much of a degenerate you were in life, you get instant 'saint' status the minute you kick the bucket. It's pathetic, really.
Yes, even women, the most complex living thing in the universe, can be summed up with an A+B combo. Well, the code is longer than that, but you have to learn how to unlock it first.
In an attempt to single-handedly save humanity from the impending arrival of zombies, I have compiled a survival list. Start preparing now, before you're eaten alive.