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What's so funny about bikes?
Even though it probably doesn't mean much now, your first bike is probably the greatest present you've ever received:
My First Bike
They can't make a man look manly in any way possible:
Manford Has a Limp Dick
Believe it or not, bike racks still exist in today's society:
A Drunk's Guide to Bar Hopping
Two-seaters are really gay because you'll always end up riding by yourself because no one will hop on with you:
Vicious Cycles
You got more bruises from trying to learn how to ride a bike than from getting beaten up by a bully:
Dear Fucks at Edy's Ice Cream
Bike messengers only know one speed: really really fast!:
Hot Time in the City: Moving to NYC After Graduation
Their only weakness is grass because in most cases when you ride on it, you'll end up eating it after a hard fall:
The Fire Within Me, Chapter 4
Even though people try to pedal them as fast they can, the stationary ones at the gym aren't time machines:
Dear Old People at the Gym
When you see people riding one in the street while you're driving, you want to kick the living shit out of them:
That's What Sidewalks are for
They're the lazy version of running:
Women are Like Shoes...
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