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Anna: Do I look fat in this?
Rowan: No Ann, you look like my mother.
-On abbreviated settlements
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About Deus X Machina 
Satire, horoscopes, standup comedy, musings, and rants.
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Recent Posts:
Satire, horoscopes, standup comedy, musings, and rants.
Subscribe to Xavier's blog RSS feed
Recent Posts:
- Fuck You, Bill Simmons
- Porn is Terrible, Part II (And You Enjoy Rape)
- Pointless Rap Beef
- Porn is Terrible, Part I
- Locks of Thinly Veiled Disdain
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About Xavier Holland
Hometown
New York, NY
School
Pomona College
At a Glance
"I'll make all the time feel like naked time."
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Recent Comments
| Author | Comment | Article |
|---|---|---|
| James (not verified) | Very well done. I did my | Fuck You, Bill Simmons |
| Anonymous (not verified) | Technically, the game could | Fuck You, Bill Simmons |
| Anonymous (not verified) | to all of you good people | Anti-Chuck Norris Facts |
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Quick Jokes
'Til Death Do Us Party (Comic)
By Xavier Holland November 25, 2008
| Comments (8) | Share
Dirty Painties are back. For now.
8 Comments
That's fucking funny
Agreed. Hilarious.
Dirty. Painties. Hahahaha. I get it! That's funny, dude. Thumbs up.
Thumb up (I lost a thumb in a lawnmower 'accident')
You are nothing if not a class act, X. Nice work.
Two thumbs down (it's the best a suicide can get)
this totally made my day.
Touching...i'm going to call my dad now
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