How to Be the Creepiest Friend Ever on Facebook

Guys, here's a simple way to become the creepiest friend ever on Facebook:

Go through your friend list and find every friend's girlfriend you're not friends with yet and add her as a friend. After she accepts your request, wait two days, then buy each girl a virtual kiss gift and leave her a wall post saying, "You should post more bikini pics from last summer, i'm tired of using the same ones over and over..."

If for some reason a girlfriend DOESN'T accept you as a friend within two week's time, de-friend her boyfriend (your friend). Eventually, your friend will notice you and he aren't friends anymore (he'll try to tag you in a photo or something) and he'll try to re-friend you. Ignore his request. When he calls or emails you, respond only with, "Your girlfriend's a bitch, she totally ignored me on the 'Book," then stop talking to him completely. He'll immediately ask his girlfriend what you're talking about, at which point she'll probably send you a friend request with a quick "sorry, didn't know who it was" message. Accept her request, wait two days, then buy her a virtual kiss gift and leave her a wall post saying, "Sorry i called you a bitch. But seriously, you should post more bikini pics from last summer, i'm tired of using the same ones over and over..."

Game over. Creepiest friend ever.

Unless she DOESN'T send you a friend request after her boyfriend talks with her. Then drive to their apartment, kill them, have sex with her dead body, then make his dead body have sex with her dead body, then make fun of him for getting super sloppy seconds and her for being lousy in the sack... on Facebook.

Ok, that should cover it.