So you burnt your weiner and almost burned down your kitchen. Perfect time to learn how to cope with life's tragedies.
Going for that peak-psycho ugly-cry in a public place surrounded by crazy sports fans probably isn't going to score you any "girlfriend points."
Crying yourself to sleep is an art form perfected only by those deeply emotionally scarred. Those who perfect it probably aren't proud of this feat, either.
A whiny hoe with a bloody vag leaves her mark on Gaudio, prompting him to disavow one night stands and *gasp* embrace monogamy.