I’m the Couch You Left at the Curb, and I Am Pissed
Whose fault is it I don’t look perfect anymore? I’m pretty sure it wasn’t my arms that splashed me with queso dip.
Writer, editor, recovering mime. Latest book: The Witch Demands a Retraction: fairy-tale reboots for adults (Humorist Books). Words in: American Bystander, Lighten Up Online, McSweeney’s, The New Yorker, The New York Times, Points in Case, Rattle, Slackjaw, WaPo, Weekly Humorist & elsewhere. Forthcoming in fall '23: Satan Talks to His Therapist (Paul Dry Books).
Whose fault is it I don’t look perfect anymore? I’m pretty sure it wasn’t my arms that splashed me with queso dip.