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Quick Jokes
School:
OtherClass of:
2007Hometown:
Perth, Australia (just picture the post-apocalyptic wasteland of I AM LEGEND, only with more kangaroos, and the bloodthirsty mutant freaks have the vote)At a Glance:
Mad, blue-haired, late twenties Forensic Entomology major (I can bring whole dinner parties to a nauseous standstill with my tales of Bot-Fly life cycles) at the University of Western Australia. I was in the same class as Hugh Jackman once—long enough to get bored by the lecture, not long enough for a decent grope. Hoping to one day become a CSI, or write for CSI, or at least visit the set of CSI and be the creamy Aussie filling in a Nick/Greg sandwich. By the way, I'm gay.Bio:
I'm a 28-year-old Sandgroper (that's ocker slang for West Aussie—I don't hump dirt) who likes insects and arachnids, horror movies and hot guys. Not necessarily all at the same time or for the same purpose. My ambitions in life are to become a Forensic Entomologist, make armfuls of cash, have a spider named after me (I don't work with cute critters), and marry Seann William Scott, James Marsden and/or David Tennant. What?! I can multi-task!- Blog Posts
- Comments
Attack of the Prones
By Gavin Pitt October 20, 2009Bonjour, Bandagers!
You may not know it to look at me, but I belong to a minority group (no, not that one). It's a group of people who are sadly endangered across the globe (usually by ourselves) and talked about in hushed whispers—lest we hear you talking about us, come over and you enter the radius of dangerous proximity.
Yes friends, I am accident prone. Read More »
It's 3am, Do You Know Where Your Frontal Lobes Are?
By Gavin Pitt October 6, 2009Salutations, Sarcophages! Read More »
Four and Twenty Blackbirds RAKING YOUR EYE!
By Gavin Pitt September 28, 2009Hiya, Hawkmen! Read More »
Welcome to Australia - Here's Your Antivenom
By Gavin Pitt August 20, 2009Hoo-roo Jackaroos! Read More »
Ten MORE Commandments
By Gavin Pitt August 16, 2009Aloha, Angels (the hot one with fangs and the great ass from BUFFY, or the sexy sarcastic one from SUPERNATURAL that clearly wants to play hide the halo with Jared Padelecki, take your pick). Read More »
The Bore* That Broke the Camel's Back (*Original Noun Changed to Avoid Lawsuit)
By Gavin Pitt August 5, 2009G'day, Cobbers! Read More »
This One Time, At Bug Camp...
By Gavin Pitt July 29, 2009Aloha, Arachnophiles!
This week find your invertebrate-loving invert just returned from a three-day Entomological field trip. Read More »
You Wanna See Something REALLY Scary?!
By Gavin Pitt July 4, 2009G'Day, Gorehounds!
When it comes to movies, there's nothing more satisfying to me than a good, balls-to-the-wall (or even better,balls-hacked-off-with-a-machete-and-flung-at-the-wall. In-3D) horror film. Read More »
The (Tasmanian) Devil's Dictionary
By Gavin Pitt June 27, 2009Whassup, Wordsmiths?
Did you know that American writer Ambrose Bierce (1842-1914?) was born in Ohio? Or that he disappeared without a trace in Mexico in late 1913? And that arguably his most famous work was THE DEVIL'S DICTIONARY, in which Bierce presented a bitterly funny list of words in a dictionary-type format, often revolving around clever puns or sarcastic jokes? Read More »
- So today's lesson is, don't - November 20th, 2009
- Some of these are gold man- - November 19th, 2009
- Jessica- [ive always - November 18th, 2009
- Jessica- agreed! Beards are - November 18th, 2009
- X, I like that church bread - November 18th, 2009
- It will when I assemble a - November 18th, 2009
- Yeah, I've never understood - November 18th, 2009
- I'm glad you mentioned the - November 18th, 2009
- Keen article. Love the - November 17th, 2009
- Casey- of course. You see? - November 17th, 2009
- Blasphemer! :holds Justin to - November 17th, 2009
- Ahh, the irony of the - November 17th, 2009
- Like many separatists, she - November 17th, 2009
- If you don't know, then - November 15th, 2009
- I'm still amazed that you - November 15th, 2009
- Neat! The poor little guy - November 15th, 2009
- So far as I know, she - November 14th, 2009
- I suddenly have an urge to - November 14th, 2009
- Mmmm... Justin Long.... - November 13th, 2009
- I'd like to see an alternate - November 12th, 2009
- Hey, Why does she feel the - November 12th, 2009
- Every time the 2012 trailer - November 10th, 2009
- Dude, I'm with Andrei. And - November 10th, 2009
- Keen dreads! Dude, you - November 10th, 2009
- Hee! Thanks... I always - November 9th, 2009
- News: "Authorities were - November 9th, 2009
- Glad you liked it! Yeah, - November 9th, 2009
- Keen article, but be careful - November 9th, 2009
- Bill- But then the bed would - November 8th, 2009
- Hee! Awesome article. Love - November 7th, 2009
- Indeed, I've also broken a - November 7th, 2009
- Hee! Awesome post as usual - November 6th, 2009
- I was trying to relate it - November 5th, 2009
- IN THE HIGHEST OF SKIES - November 5th, 2009
- Dude, ix-nay on the - November 5th, 2009
- Hey Nick, No, not that TRICK - November 5th, 2009
- Hello friend! I am the - November 5th, 2009
- I thought a strand of DNA at - November 4th, 2009
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- Hee! Your organs and you are - November 4th, 2009
- Hey, [I'm more likely to - November 4th, 2009
- One Pride March/Party over - November 3rd, 2009
- Dude, it didn't work for - November 3rd, 2009
- Andrei- haha nice try. You - November 3rd, 2009
- Hey, If you wanted to be - November 3rd, 2009
- So you'd fuck Adolf Hitler - November 1st, 2009
- Hey Dude, Neat - November 1st, 2009
- Tom Cruise? :vomits: - November 1st, 2009
- Andrei and Nick, Yeah, even - October 31st, 2009
- I mentioned Vampirella (and - October 31st, 2009
- Dude, I had to. True - October 31st, 2009
- Hmmm... IWell, I may have to - October 30th, 2009
- Dude, once you've read - October 30th, 2009
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- Heee! Awesome as always. I - October 30th, 2009
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- Andrei, See all I heard was - October 26th, 2009
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- I always thought that Bin - October 26th, 2009
- No, no no! I meant we agree - October 25th, 2009
- Andrei- Again your ideals - October 25th, 2009
- I appreciated the new TCM - October 25th, 2009
- This could be true. - October 24th, 2009
- Hey, Keen article. I enjoyed - October 24th, 2009
- Thank God we don't have - October 23rd, 2009
- Kareem Abdul-Jabar in - October 23rd, 2009
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- This just in: this morning, - October 21st, 2009
- That's what he said! *g* - October 21st, 2009
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- Awesome article Casey. I - October 20th, 2009
- "Hi, I'm actor Troy McClure. - October 18th, 2009
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- also - October 15th, 2009
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- Casey, Awesome article... We - October 14th, 2009
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- ANGEL HEART (1987) sums it - October 13th, 2009
- Indeed! Penguins are up my - October 13th, 2009
- I try my best, but no, - October 12th, 2009
- Well, if any of your - October 10th, 2009
- Hey Andrei, hey, if that's - October 10th, 2009
- I've always been vaguely - October 9th, 2009
- Welcome to the Club. You get - October 9th, 2009
- Dear Alex, Awesome - October 7th, 2009
- Auugh! I've been - October 7th, 2009
- "It was a dream of - October 7th, 2009
- Be careful what you wish - October 7th, 2009
- Well done AAE! - October 7th, 2009
- Indeed you are on the right - October 7th, 2009
- Hey, Well I thought there - October 7th, 2009
- Thankees. Tea? Dang, I knew - October 7th, 2009
- Thanks for the kind words - October 6th, 2009
- Hey, You say "ragged" I say - October 6th, 2009
- Heh. Awesome article! You - October 6th, 2009
- Great article! Admit it- - October 6th, 2009
- You think that's hard, try - October 6th, 2009
- Did you serve as the - October 4th, 2009
- A Seminal article (heh)! - October 4th, 2009
- Vamp Gavin waits a few - October 4th, 2009
- [(Andrei slinks away using a - October 3rd, 2009
- Andrei, No fair you stalking - October 2nd, 2009
- Awesome post. And dude, just - October 2nd, 2009
- Awww. Cute bitches! - October 2nd, 2009
- [Although, I would be - September 30th, 2009
- Nice try, anonymous #1- you - September 29th, 2009
- Yes, but your pet Magpie - September 29th, 2009
- It's a good idea- lowering - September 29th, 2009
- Glad you liked it! And - September 28th, 2009
- Glad you liked it! Thanks - September 28th, 2009
- When I was a kid (and alas, - September 28th, 2009
- My favourite bit in CSI is - September 28th, 2009
- Search parties over here - September 27th, 2009
- Awesome article. Don't - September 27th, 2009
- btw- also pet stores - September 27th, 2009
- Alex- Funny article. I have - September 27th, 2009
- Well, I'd get married if I - September 27th, 2009
- Awesome article dude! Love - September 26th, 2009
- Yeah, but my Gaydar was - September 21st, 2009
- So a Skort is either a skirt - September 21st, 2009
- Hey, Neat - September 21st, 2009
- Court, Andrei, Boonstra, - September 20th, 2009
- btw- not that she looks like - September 18th, 2009
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- It's funny 'cause it's true - September 17th, 2009
- About an hour- Court keeps - September 16th, 2009
- Thankees, glad you liked it. - September 15th, 2009
- Humanity is doomed. That's - September 14th, 2009
- I'll never be able to look - September 12th, 2009
- I always wondered about that - September 11th, 2009
- This? Was 150 different - September 9th, 2009
- Neat article dude. As a - September 9th, 2009
- Heh. You know, "beefcake" is - September 9th, 2009
- No, cock doesn't count as - September 8th, 2009
- btw- I've also eaten - September 8th, 2009
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- WHAT? America has Tim-Tams - September 8th, 2009
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- Australia has Tim-Tams. - September 8th, 2009
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- A little from column A, a - September 7th, 2009
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- -Sounds like you need to - September 6th, 2009
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- Yes, Dane Cook is a douche. - September 6th, 2009
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- It's a gift?! I did also - September 6th, 2009
- btw again- Anonymous is - September 6th, 2009
- btw- congratulations on - September 6th, 2009
- The only thing I know about - September 5th, 2009
- Once America's oil runs out, - September 5th, 2009
- btw again- also Wolverine - September 5th, 2009
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- Well, Andrei being straight, - August 31st, 2009
- "Hmmph....Sailors...." *g* - August 31st, 2009
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- Andrei, Now *that's* how you - August 30th, 2009
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- *g*= LOLspeak for "grin", ie - August 25th, 2009
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- As a Forensic Entomology - August 21st, 2009
- btw- The Cybermen beat the - August 21st, 2009
- Most excellent, as always. - August 21st, 2009
- Maybe "Sarah Palin is a - August 20th, 2009
- The Gayest Fag ever? Well, I - August 20th, 2009
- I'm not sure whether this - August 19th, 2009
- Hey Arnold! started life as - August 19th, 2009
- Sorry Court, but I have to - August 18th, 2009
- Deer Anymoos, Yew arr rite - August 18th, 2009
- Watch it, love it, and slash - August 17th, 2009
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- So they turned you into Koko - August 16th, 2009
- Hey Andrei, [And I'm glad - August 16th, 2009
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- I'm pretty sure that the - August 14th, 2009
- (cum grano salis) - August 14th, 2009
- Quid pro quo, Clarice... - August 14th, 2009
- Well, shopping in general is - August 14th, 2009
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- Like I've said before, I - August 14th, 2009
- Don't forget MUNCHIE 2, - August 14th, 2009
- Yo Casey, Don't know about - August 13th, 2009
- -Someday someone (maybe you - August 13th, 2009
- Grrrrrrr... I'm Gay, and I - August 13th, 2009
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- I could be into that- - August 13th, 2009
- (I also suspect that the - August 12th, 2009
- The Cane Toad problem would - August 12th, 2009
- You could always do Gay - August 12th, 2009
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- But think of poor Sammy - August 6th, 2009
- Hey, Awesome as always. I do - August 5th, 2009
- Earth: it's all fun and - August 2nd, 2009
- It gets Gay? :steeples - August 2nd, 2009
- Ahh, but Quinn Prime was - August 2nd, 2009
- - You're not the boss of - August 1st, 2009
- Your parallel universe - July 31st, 2009
- I love Anonymous! They're so - July 31st, 2009
- At least you've never - July 31st, 2009
- They were secure enough in - July 30th, 2009
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- As an Australian, and thus - July 24th, 2009
- As a major vampire film - July 22nd, 2009
- I thought Ryan Reynolds did - July 22nd, 2009
- ... Your fondness for - July 21st, 2009
- 1] I'm pleased that the - July 20th, 2009
- Hey Andrei, Found some more - July 20th, 2009
- Hey, -So homosexuals are - July 18th, 2009
- Quite possibly. You can - July 18th, 2009
- Instead of playing - July 17th, 2009
- Hey, Neat article. And I say - July 16th, 2009







