Yo whaddup? I interviewed the machine behind the man, Conor Tripler (pictured above). And if you don’t know who that is, you’re doing this whole “life” thing wrong. 

What is the origin story of the beautiful man called Conor Tripler?
I was raised by a pair of loving websites. Forged from the info-wires and broadband-DNA they shared. I took the form of a Twitter account and shortly thereafter began pretending to be a human boy so as to help my readers identify more readily. Emotional landscapes are difficult for me but I map and explore them tirelessly. 

What caused you to rise against the haters? Any certain instance?
I don’t respect the haters. I never have. I show a lot of disrespect to the haters. Haters are confused admirers. There will be no haters at my wedding. I let my haters be my motivators. Screw the haters.  

Tell me about the weed bongs.
I do not smoke weed bongs because they are illegal. My fried Clyde smoked a weed bong and died. I tweet about the weed bongs to raise awareness. I care about America and I love cops. 

What do you consider to be your best tweet? Which was your first?
My early days of tweeting were difficult. I mashed at the keyboard to try to figure it out. I wrote things on paper and tried to load them into the disk drive. I poured Red Bull into the USB ports to make it tweet faster. In early 2011 I really “hit my stride.”My personal favorite tweet is the one on my favstar about my raccoon roommate searching for pictures of overturned garbage cans on Google. It actually happened. It’s real. 

My Google History is 200 pictures of overturned garbage cans • explain thyself • Youre my only roommate who knows my password & is a raccoon

What perks have you found in becoming a twitter celebrity?
Real talk, actually a lot. It’s a beautiful community. I’ve made some incredible friends on twitter, many of whom I’ve ended up meeting in real life. It’s a great place to connect with like-minded artists, writers, designers, you name it. A number of collaborations and opportunities have come out of twitter for me. Most notably: having some of my poetry and short fiction published, and getting the opportunity to befriend or work with some of my idols including BJ Novak of The Office, the members of Das Racist, or the DJ Porter Robinson. It’s an honor, really, that so many people enjoy the thought-fragments I spin out on twitter.

Has Conor Tripler ever been convicted of being a hater?
Convicted, no. Accused, yes. The hater syndrome lives somewhere deep in all of us, the way the devil creeps in the nooks & crannies of a church. It takes self-appraisal and meditation to keep the hater within at bay. I’m always aware of my natural hater tendencies. I will not be consumed by the hater. I love to love.

In the big picture, what does Conor Tripler hope to gain from tweeting?
Well, most recently I got a great opportunity to write a script for a TV show pilot so that is what I am working on currently. It would be a dream come true to write for a comedy series, and if tweeting is the way I get there, then that’s pretty cool if you ask me. Which you are. Cheers!  

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