Chris Phelan

School: University of Connecticut

Class of: 2006

Hometown: Philadelphia, PA

At a Glance:

Chris Phelan, an alum of the University of Connecticut as of December 2006, is currently residing in the Philadelphia area doing absolutely nothing... why didn't anybody tell him journalism majors make absolutely no money?

Bio:

Chris's writing skills have been critiqued by many the esteemed critic, i.e. the faithful readers of PointsinCase.com. Some of his personal favorite comments are as follows:

"If I ever see you, I will knock your lights out." -Randy, 01/28/07

"Only a 13 year old girl could hold the position you have here stated." -'Turdburglar', 01/21/07

"[Your column] was a slap in the face with the obvious stick." -Tara, 12/22/06

"i am a big, ugly, slut that dropped out of 10th grade after my second baby, and all i want to say is, i hate you, chris phelan." -'foot face', 12/21/06

Chris is a respectable 81% from the free throw line, prefers good old Budweiser, although he's doesn't own a pickup truck or follows NASCAR, and almost hit a hole-in-one on a real golf course once. He also might be the only red-blooded male in America who includes Ashlee Simpson in his "top 3 women" list. But whatever, he's got his reasons.

Chris secretly hopes that his entertaining, easy-to-read, clever writing style eventually leads him into a torrid love affair with Rachel McAdams. And by Rachel McAdams he means anybody who is willing to agree to call their relationship "torrid." I mean, come on, that just sounds great.

Column:

Three Beers Deep
An assortment of guides, stories, and observational humor from a guy who realized writing a weekly column can't be done sober.

The Madden-ing Crowd 18 ,
A Beginner's Guide to the Gym 6 , 3.5
Three Beers Deep 0 ,
Brooke Burke Could Have Done Things 6 , 2.0
Murphy's Laws of Facebook 9 , 4.2
The Elisha Theory 4 ,
Insert Restaurant Name Here 34 , 4.2
The Invincible Summer 14 , 3.7
My Own Personal Blooper Reel 8 ,
How You Spent Christmas Day 8 , 4.0
Your Mom's an Observational Humor 16 ,
Ode to The Office 27 , 4.0
The Pop Quiznos Story 14 ,
Visiting Your Friends' Friends 15 ,
The Definitive 2007 Wish List 15 ,
Riding the Campus Shuttle... To Cooltown 5 , 5.0
Five Ingredients for an Awful Girl 18 , 4.0
Laying Down Your AIM Game 11 , 3.0
Viva la MTV 25 , 4.0

Comedy Articles: