College Quotes
"Dating is the most useless and rotten attempt by completely worthless individuals to establish a faulty image for somebody they wish to impress in a desperate, neurotic need for attention. Unfortunately, these phony people actually impress each other and end up producing ugly, noisy, gargoyle-like children. The genetic deformities inherent in the hideous smiles of their children only indicate the fact that they, like their parents, have NO FUTURES."
-Wesley, on the usefulness of dating
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School: Wright State University
Hometown: Saint Paul, MN
At a Glance:
For a brief period of time, Caleb was forced to assume the identity of Peabo Bryson (seriously). Caleb has worked as a professional ballet dancer, pit crew member, scoreboard operator, dog vacuumer, juggler, magician, knife thrower and foreign currency trader.Bio:
Caleb McEwen has been swarmed by over 1000 dolphins, questioned by secret service, threatened by a Tijuana cab driver, and bitten by a brown recluse spider. He has met a president, lots of senators, two former heads of the CIA, and more astronauts than he can currently remember. He has been on the stage with LL Cool J, on the court with LeBron James, on the field with Vernon Wells, and in a cloud of artificial fog with Cal Ripken Jr.Caleb has spent time in Croatia, Japan, Italy, Canada, England, Germany, France, Hungary, Malta, Greece, Austria, The Netherlands, and Iowa. In short, he gets around.
Read Caleb's previous front page articles on PIC here
Comedy Articles:
A Brief History of Phenomenally Unsuccessful Prison Gangs3 comments, 2.8 stars
Prevailing wisdom holds that joining a gang will provide protection to an inmate. But not always. This list offers an insight into the failures of incarcerated organized crime.
Guide to Writing an Effective and Concise Opening for a Short Story While Being Concise8 comments, 3.9 stars
As a writer, I have discovered a number of techniques to ensure the opening of your short story engages your audience while propelling your narrative forward at light speed. It is my pleasure to share these techniques with you in what I call 'The Three Se
You Are Not an Internet Badass
22 comments, 4.6 stars
The internet has empowered an entire group of people who should never have been empowered. And when real life hits, they better take cover.
22 comments, 4.6 stars
The internet has empowered an entire group of people who should never have been empowered. And when real life hits, they better take cover.
Remembering Joe's Bar and Grill
0 comments, 4.5 stars
In its 100 years as an icon of Americana, Joe's has hosted iguana fights, allied itself with Germany, sold opium instead of alcohol, and much more.
0 comments, 4.5 stars
In its 100 years as an icon of Americana, Joe's has hosted iguana fights, allied itself with Germany, sold opium instead of alcohol, and much more.
I Really Mucked Up that Hostage Crisis
11 comments, 3.9 stars
An open letter of apology from a regretful SWAT team member who put his fellow officers in danger. Just another reminder that alcohol kills.
11 comments, 3.9 stars
An open letter of apology from a regretful SWAT team member who put his fellow officers in danger. Just another reminder that alcohol kills.
Movies I'd Like to See...
4 comments, 4.3 stars
As Hollywood prepares to have sex with itself and birth another round of formula movies and sequels, here are a few creative twist ideas.
4 comments, 4.3 stars
As Hollywood prepares to have sex with itself and birth another round of formula movies and sequels, here are a few creative twist ideas.
