Yes, Chick-fil-A is Totally Evil — But on the Other Hand, Waffle Fries
Who could possibly resist the siren song of a factory-farmed chicken breast wedged between two nondescript slices of bread? Plus a pickle?!
Tag: Satire and Parody
New Monoculture Candidates
"Aja": Such an underrated Steely Dan album. “Deacon Blues” and “Peg” as back-to-back tracks? Come on.
Welcome to Camp Sunshine! Please Read Our 2019 Camp Policies
Camp Sunshine opens its doors at 8:55 every morning. Please drive carefully because although we have 125 campers, we only have 11 legal parking spots.
Sergeant Trite of the Cliché Squad
"Never fear, Trite is here!" boomed out a familiar and hearty voice. "Better late than never, you know."
An Open Letter to the “Pay It Forward” Person at the Drive-Thru
Being a happy-go-lightly, vacant soul, you’re probably wondering why I didn’t use that fistful of dollars to pay for the order of the guy behind me.
Who Wrote It? Immanuel Kant or Gary Gygax?
Everyone talks about Kant and Gygax without bothering to read them and their writing styles are very similar.
Keanu Reeves and the Argument for Simulation Theory
It was now blindingly obvious that this convergence of Keanu was more than just happenstance.
A Plea From the Chair You Put Your Stuff On
The purpose of the chair is to hold the Butt. This has been the truth for eons, before you were born and before I was purchased from the local IKEA.
Identifying Fauxpreneurs in the Wild
Fauxpreneurs believe if you’re not on the ‘gram, you will never become a unicorn. Look for at least three pictures per day showing her “hustling."
Hostage Emails From My Brother’s Kidnappers
I want to complement the kidnappers’ willingness to take down all of Larry’s dictation. That’s very considerate for kidnappers. He’s lucky.