Why do students ask for thesis help and professional assistance with other papers? There may be different reasons: lack of time, unclear requirements, etc. But most students send “write my essay” messages when they doubt their writing skills. It is a good idea to hire someone who will help you but it doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t develop your knowledge and practice your writing. One of the best strategies to achieve this goal is to learn from the best ones. And when it comes to the humoristic genre, you should definitely adopt some experience from Soviet satirist Mikhail Zoshchenko.

Who is Mikhail Zoshchenko?

Biographical facts are necessary to understand Zoshchenko's personality and the sources of his humor. He was born in 1894 in Saint Petersburg, Russia. The future satirist attended the Faculty of Law but didn’t graduate because of financial issues. Instead, he served in the army during World War and was wounded several times. He also served in the Russian Civil War, and these wars affected his health pretty much.

Before his brilliant career in the humoristic genre, Zoshchenko had changed a lot of jobs. He was Post and Telegraph Commandant, Criminal Investigation Agent, Rabbit Breeding and Poultry Inspector, Border Guard Telephone Operator, Police Officer, Shoemaker, Port Clerk, and so on. If you read his story “What Were My Professions,” you’ll find out more about these experiences.

It is a famous fact that many humorists and, especially, satirists, have a difficult life with many challenges. Mikhail Zoshchenko was no exception. He used his art to show the flaws of the entire life and society and to teach people a positive attitude even in the darkest times.

The Best Mikhail Zoshchenko Quotes

“What kind of noise, but no fights?”

This quote is from the famous story “Nervous People” (1925). The situation takes place in a communal apartment where the tenants had an argument over some kitchen staff. Once the old Gavrilich asks “What kind of noise, but no fights?” the real fight began.

“Who has no money, does not go with the ladies.”

In the story “Aristocrat” the lady and the hero went to a cafe to eat cakes. And there was a conflict between the bartender and the hero, who tried to prove that they ate fewer cakes than they actually did. The story ends with a dialogue between the abused woman and the hero dissatisfied with her behavior. She said, “Who has no money, does not go with the ladies!”

Actually, this story has one more funny quote “Happiness is not in money. Sorry for the phrasing.”

“Sleep soon—someone else needs your pillow.”

This is a funny phrase from the story “Sleep Soon,” which tells the story of a traveler and his attempts to have a night in a provincial hotel. There were bedbugs, a sagging bed, and cats jumping out of the window from the trash heap, and, of course, there was a scandalous neighbor. The hero managed to fall asleep only in the morning and he remembered the phrasing from the poster: “Sleep soon—someone else needs your pillow.”

“Human is a rather weird animal.”

This is the first phrase from the story “Sick.” It unfolds a dialogue between hospital patients who boast about their diseases and try in every possible way to defend the importance of their ailments.

Some Other Zoshchenko Quotes You Should Know

  • “People like to boast of their vices. This is terribly trendy.”
  • “In a peasant country, a peasant must rule. The intellectual will turn to the West.”
  • “The meaning of life is not to satisfy desires, but to have them.”
  • “Lies and art create life.”
  • “A frightened writer is a loss of skill.”
  • “Beautiful is never funny.”
  • “Love, surprisingly, is primarily associated with the biggest troubles.”
  • “If a woman is virtuous, then she alone knows about it. If she is vicious, who does not know this?

How Can You Use Quotes to Make Your Writing Better?

When you read someone else’s stories, especially stories written by great authors, you receive an opportunity to understand how this person thinks. You get a new perception of the world and you understand that there are no limits. So, if you want to get the best grades for your essays, you should read a lot and try different techniques that will make your writing better.

Besides, you can use various quotes from Zoshchenko or other satirists in your papers. They can be an epigraph for a paragraph, a hook to attract the audience’s attention, a tool that will make regular writing a bit funnier. Besides, Mikhail Zoshchenko’s quotes are not overused like Churchill’s or Paolo Coelho’s ones. Use them in your papers, and your professor will surely appreciate your approach!


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