Voyeur IM >>
9-7-05

Werewolf Mikey: I suck at getting my writing done lately
courtjester5000: i mean, once you get past the “sucking at life” part, i guess we could get specific
Werewolf Mikey: im bogged
Werewolf Mikey: new orleans style
courtjester5000: mmmm
Werewolf Mikey: minus awkward kanye west commenting on me
courtjester5000: were you embarrassed for black people when he said that
Werewolf Mikey: i was proud of them
courtjester5000: oh, right.
Werewolf Mikey: chris tucker covered geniously
courtjester5000: a;lksdfjasdf
courtjester5000: if by covered you mean, wore clothes that day
Werewolf Mikey: yes
Werewolf Mikey: mike myers hit the self-destruct button
Werewolf Mikey: but aborted the countdown when they cut away
courtjester5000: thats what you get for putting socially concious celebs on open mike
courtjester5000: a bunch of racially charged political commentary….and janet jackson's boob.
Werewolf Mikey: yes
Werewolf Mikey: george bush doesn't care about black people
Werewolf Mikey: i love that quote
Werewolf Mikey: because it was so non-sequitor
Werewolf Mikey: if he had been there he would have replied with
Werewolf Mikey: YES I DO
courtjester5000
: it was almost as if he knew he would be cut off immediately
courtjester5000: i wonder if he had anything to follow that up with
Werewolf Mikey: well he broke off in a rant earlier
Werewolf Mikey: i think that was his grand finale
courtjester5000: ya, but he had more than one line left at that time right?
Werewolf Mikey: i wonder what teleprompted him to say that
courtjester5000: i doubt anything
courtjester5000: he had that shit saved up
courtjester5000: you don't just say something like that without considering the consequences
courtjester5000: kanye's smarter than that
Werewolf Mikey: candy canye
Werewolf Mikey: Mike found himself myred in dead air
courtjester5000: haha
Werewolf Mikey: inbetween a chris ROCK wannabe and a hard place
courtjester5000: and you get a mike tuckerson
Werewolf Mikey: i half expected him to bust out dr evil's voice to ease the tension
courtjester5000: ;lkasldfas
Werewolf Mikey: “Please give us One million dollars”
courtjester5000: ahaha
courtjester5000: or he could have said
courtjester5000: one TRILLION dollars
courtjester5000: and then chris could've been like, ummm
courtjester5000: dont you mean a billion
Werewolf Mikey: kanye: Jesus walks… but not in New Orleans, it's flooded and George Bush left the faucet running
Werewolf Mikey: Chris tried his best to plug the holes in the dyke
Werewolf Mikey: but you could see him Tucker out and repeat himself
courtjester5000: kanye sounded really nervous when he talked
Werewolf Mikey: he should have rapped it
courtjester5000: welcome to the Very Much African announcements indeed
courtjester5000: i need to stop biting my nails
courtjester5000: i got the third infection ever in my right thumb the other week
Werewolf Mikey: hahahah
courtjester5000: im thinking of having a charity event
courtjester5000: get pledges from people to help me stop
courtjester5000: everything donated to the red cross or something lame
courtjester5000: w;osdiljga
Werewolf Mikey: awerawer
Werewolf Mikey: GEORGE BUSH DOES NOT CARE ABOUT MY NAILS
courtjester5000: maybe like every 1mm of white nail gets 50 cents pledge
courtjester5000: x 10 fingers max
courtjester5000: =$5 per week or so
courtjester5000: this relief effort could take a while
courtjester5000: people in new orleans start praying for my nails to grow faster
courtjester5000: george bush passes laws against dead skin anywhere on the body
Werewolf Mikey: your fingers: EAT ME!
courtjester5000: me: NO YOU EAT ME!
Werewolf Mikey: and then they run themselves along a 20 and say
Werewolf Mikey: “look, CLAWED MONAY!”
Werewolf Mikey: I'll be taking that by the hard way
Werewolf Mikey: need to buy better jokes
Werewolf Mikey: and poor sullivan with no nails can't defend himself either
courtjester5000: and you know how catty i am
Werewolf Mikey: court makes a FELINE for the doggy door
courtjester5000: i declaw myself to feel more vulnerable
Werewolf Mikey: hawer
Werewolf Mikey: just to feel
courtjester5000: JUST TO
courtjester5000: FEEL
courtjester5000: ANYTHING
Werewolf Mikey: other than this damn collar
Werewolf Mikey: I would kill myself but i'm too much of a pussy
Werewolf Mikey: and I don't have 9 nooses
courtjester5000: to me, the world is a giant litterbox
courtjester5000: i dig a hole for myself everywhere i go and just shit in it
Werewolf Mikey: it's your relief effort
Werewolf Mikey: CAT-rina
Werewolf Mikey: claws itself across Louisiana
Werewolf Mikey: GULF! Here she comes guys!
courtjester5000: if i were a looter, i would steal emergency supplies and sandbags to save for the next hurricane
Werewolf Mikey: haha
Werewolf Mikey: I would steal prime real estate
Werewolf Mikey: and/or debris
Werewolf Mikey: because once that debris aint around any more
Werewolf Mikey: it's going to sky rocket in value
courtjester5000: i would setup a toxic water polo match using dead bodies as a net
courtjester5000: uhoh, too far?
Werewolf Mikey: yea
courtjester5000: ;aislkjfasdg
courtjester5000: what i MEANT was
Werewolf Mikey: katrina went too far too
Werewolf Mikey: inland
courtjester5000: i wish there was some sort of new disaster
courtjester5000: it's always the same stuff
courtjester5000
:
hurricanes, tornados, earthquakes
courtjester5000
: i mean, humans have invented all kinds of shit, can't mother nature get a little creative
Werewolf Mikey: like a BURYCANE?
Werewolf Mikey: a big storm consisting of sand
Werewolf Mikey: and beach toys
courtjester5000: exactly
Werewolf Mikey: WHORENADO
Werewolf Mikey: she'll blow anyone
courtjester5000: and then drop like 100 beach boys imitations
courtjester5000: all playing music everywhere
Werewolf Mikey: sounds like a disnapster
Werewolf Mikey: maybe some panquakes
courtjester5000: bisquicksand
Werewolf Mikey: I ate to fast
Werewolf Mikey: and milk shot out my VolcaNOSE
courtjester5000: YIKES!
Werewolf Mikey: We should get working on all these ideas
Werewolf Mikey: The day after tomorrow
courtjester5000: shut your apocalips
Werewolf Mikey: i know it's such a mess
Werewolf Mikey: we should have a Broomsday
courtjester5000: a big sweeping disaster
courtjester5000: oh the irony of people cleaning up brooms with brooms
Werewolf Mikey: all other DUST storms would PAIL in comparison
courtjester5000: your ideas blow me away
Werewolf Mikey: speaking of a joke i uttered a few lines up
Werewolf Mikey: i had a beautiful blog about The Day After Tomorrow
Werewolf Mikey: a few weeks ago
Werewolf Mikey: it was deleted
courtjester5000: and then your computer got flooded by porn
Werewolf Mikey: but yea basically it talked about other names for the movie
Werewolf Mikey: i know it's making me all wet
Werewolf Mikey: and also how the entire time i was watching it
Werewolf Mikey: I felt cold
Werewolf Mikey: despite the fact it was like 80 degrees outside at NIGHT
courtjester5000: oooo, i love ominous overtones
courtjester5000: especially in B flat
Werewolf Mikey: one sec, phone's ringing
Werewolf Mikey: that joke fell flat
Werewolf Mikey: yours not mine
Werewolf Mikey: I was right on key west florida
Werewolf Mikey: – Hurricane Andrew
courtjester5000: hey, did the tsunami have a name
Werewolf Mikey: yea
Werewolf Mikey: “OH SH- gargle gargle”
courtjester5000: “it's O-S-C-A-R!”
Werewolf Mikey: that's what everyone said when it showed up
Werewolf Mikey: That's bull man
courtjester5000: i thought my tsunami had a last name, but that was just bologna
Werewolf Mikey: I'm sick of the weather academy always giving it away to undeserving deep sea swells who make their way to the coast
courtjester5000: seriously, how about all the poor giant undercurrents who build up much farther away
Werewolf Mikey: trying to breakthrough to the surface
courtjester5000: it's hard to make a name for yourself these days
Werewolf Mikey: Luters all over new orleans are raiding music shops
courtjester5000: all the weather academy producers are just looking for the next big hit
Werewolf Mikey: Yea once a storm goes mainstream I don't even follow it anymore
courtjester5000: ;laksj;aliewrtgja;lskgjs
courtjester5000: *best joke award*
Werewolf Mikey: werawerawer
courtjester5000: most mainstream hits cant weather the storm anyway
courtjester5000: too much air pressure
Werewolf Mikey: *I'd like to thank… oh geez i know I'm going to forget someone*
Werewolf Mikey: it's impossible to write in a vacuum
courtjester5000: but everything sounds cleaner
Werewolf Mikey: HURRy It up KANyE
Werewolf Mikey: you're about to be cut off the air
courtjester5000: i…..hate george bush….senior.
courtjester5000: and…..george washington….carver.
Werewolf Mikey: throwbacks baby
Werewolf Mikey: well i must go
Werewolf Mikey: sleep time
Werewolf Mikey: as I've found the most annoying thing about school
courtjester5000
: sucking the professor's dick?
Werewolf Mikey: is procrastinating on work and having it load up on you
courtjester5000: oh, right.
Werewolf Mikey: only made worse
Werewolf Mikey: by the fact that
courtjester5000: they always loaded up on me
Werewolf Mikey: I actually enjoy the classes im taking
courtjester5000: ah, yes
courtjester5000: professors with big dicks.
courtjester5000: i remember those classes
courtjester5000: well, go to class
Werewolf Mikey: you mean bed
courtjester5000: learn while you still can
Werewolf Mikey: the drinking
Werewolf Mikey: is killing productivity
courtjester5000: you should save that for post college
courtjester5000: there's plenty of time for it
courtjester5000: just ask nate
Werewolf Mikey: in every dept. except having funny quotes the next day
Werewolf Mikey: yea
Werewolf Mikey: master nate
Werewolf Mikey: spewing forth with stories of drunken debauchery
courtjester5000: what a guy
Werewolf Mikey: oh wait I already mocked him *links to post 3 weeks old*
courtjester5000: haha
courtjester5000: i thought you had to be 60+ to have as many stories as he does
Werewolf Mikey: or a skyscraper
courtjester5000: i dont think there's enough time in his life to generate that much material
Werewolf Mikey: unless you're a seamstress
courtjester5000: oooohh
Werewolf Mikey: DAYUM
Werewolf Mikey: well…
Werewolf Mikey: i feel bad not writing
Werewolf Mikey: like i've let my reader's down
courtjester5000: as you should
Werewolf Mikey: and you down
Werewolf Mikey: but most of all me down
courtjester5000: weaving a life of deception
Werewolf Mikey: hanging on a thread
Werewolf Mikey: gotta pull myself up by my bootstraps
courtjester5000: gotta put on that thimble and finger yourself
courtjester5000: *wrong convo*
Werewolf Mikey: Ali i'm guessing?
courtjester5000: duh, why else has she not come up for air yet
Werewolf Mikey: “How to walk away from people you've fucked”
courtjester5000: a;lskdfjsdf
courtjester5000: *story of my life*
courtjester5000: “how to have meaningless sex and be obvious about it online”
Werewolf Mikey: awerawerw
Werewolf Mikey: IN SPAIN
courtjester5000: as;odiula;skfas
courtjester5000: THE REMIX BABY!
Werewolf Mikey: dammit I can't go too far with this
Werewolf Mikey: don't want to blow all my material on her
Werewolf Mikey: prematurely
courtjester5000: satisfaction comes in small doses
Werewolf Mikey: ABOUT LAST WEEK…
Werewolf Mikey: wasn't it the same as the one before?
courtjester5000: IN SPAIN
Werewolf Mikey: ahwerhawerhawr
courtjester5000: COMING SOON TO A CONTINENT NEAR YOU!
Werewolf Mikey: thank you
Werewolf Mikey: i was waiting to throw that one back in again
courtjester5000: PISSING SOON INCONTINENT AM I!
Werewolf Mikey: GUYS LET ME EX-SPAIN
courtjester5000: IT WAS JUST A LITTLE EUR-GROPE
Werewolf Mikey: he was worth it too
Werewolf Mikey: until I got robbed on the beach
Werewolf Mikey: which sounds like a drink that got me wasted there in the first place
courtjester5000: and im talking about rob thompson, not rob from indiana, GOSH
Werewolf Mikey: now i'm asking for a BarceLOANa
Werewolf Mikey: ROBERTO
courtjester5000: i was worried about disease after he told me he was from germany
Werewolf Mikey: “My ass hurts… IN SPAIN”
Werewolf Mikey: yea i really need to stop before i used up my jokes
courtjester5000: ;aslkdfjasdf
Werewolf Mikey: and get to bed
Werewolf Mikey: ali's bed
courtjester5000: such a cliche thing to say
courtjester5000: ahaha
Werewolf Mikey: in VAGINA
Werewolf Mikey signed off at 4:58:58 AM.

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