Casey and guy friend hugging

While enjoying my vacation back in the USA, I took my mom out for a little date-type thing. We shopped at thrift stores, washed her car, chit-chatted all day, and then ate all types of fondue at The Melting Pot. The latter was one of my favorite memories of being back in the States. So I told a friend about it and he said, "You ate fondue? That's so gay! With your mom? That's even gayer!"

I don't understand this idea that things that make women happy are also gay. Was our fondue waiter gay? Sure was, but he waited on us better than I've ever been waited on before, even with friends as my server. This gay waiter also made my mom and I laugh, something that just makes me happy.

Is making my mom happy gay? Not in my book.

A long time ago I wrote about how I learned to dance for my physical education class in university. Was it mostly girls and gay guys? Yup. But I learned how to dance. And you know what? Girls love dancing. While some guys sit at the bar nursing their drink calling me a "faggot," I'm dancing with their girls and stealing some away.

I remember an episode of The Sopranos where Tony yells at his wife for telling his friends he goes down on her. What? I'm so happy when my girlfriend brags about my oral sex skills. Why? Because girls are really good at paying you back. I don't see anything homosexual about a girl giving me oral pleasure.

Back before I learned how to be less crude, I thought, "Only homos shave their faces or dress really nicely." Then I realized some ladies don't like razor burn, or being seen with a guy who looks like he just woke up behind a dumpster. And most bosses like to hire clean-looking employees. Not so gay.

Do I like fondue, shopping, or taking a straight-edge to my face? Not really, but I like seeing my ladyfriends happy, and sometimes that happiness translates into vaginal or oral intercourse, which I really like. I don't find that to be gay.

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