Franz Kafka’s Bar Mitzvah Speech
The theme of my Bar Mitzvah is “Lying awake at night, your face slick with sweat, drowning in a pool of your own despair.”
The theme of my Bar Mitzvah is “Lying awake at night, your face slick with sweat, drowning in a pool of your own despair.”
How'd you do this time? That looks marvelous! Oh, would you look at that: the lead just fell out. How does that even happen?
I don’t understand why no one wants to hire me. I played opposite Annette Benning, for fuck sakes.
This movie is about me. But it’s also about love and family and loyalty and Christianity, but don’t say that last part out loud.
Hope everything's been going well for you! I know it's a little bonkers to keep following up, but you did say to keep nudging, so here I am!
I can photograph them from straight away with the bottle centered, straight away with the bottle slightly off-center to the left...
All you have to do is twist me open and plop me on a platter. I'm as easy as they come, sweetheart.
I’m thankful for friendships, romance, love of family--any bond that involves physical contact and is so strong it can supersede self-preservation.
Netherfield is taken by a Mr. Bingley, a young man of large fortune; that he fled from Texas’ COVID surge in his Tesla Model X.
Do you know what it’s like for me when you’re out haunting someone else? It’s quiet. No branches scraping the windows, no creaking floorboards.
If you could make sure all of these opera chandeliers are turned off, that would be great.
I joined roommate Jonathan in his habit of peeing directly on the floor, giving it the sticky coating and glossy sheen I’m used to seeing at venues.