From 150 miles under the bandstand of Toms River, NJ, a demon explains what it's like to be a timeshare telemarketer in Hell.
Everyone thinks that our Lord wore tattered rags and robes and ancient-day-Crocs because he liked them, but that's actually just what was fashionable back then.
I will dispel the pseudo-socialist notion that the Messiah is from the same place as Wilmer Valderrama by shout-typing my evidence in your face.
Many anti-Semites are also God-fearing Christians, whose savior is Jesus Christ. So how can they make peace between despising Jews and worshipping one?
We at the NYT are thrilled to provide a forum for Our Lord to share His divine wisdom, advice and insight into the people and events that have shaped history.
Thugs, models, people dying from thirst, even God are all sipping on this classic drink. Grab a glass before it's too late!
Although You and your Son continue to get rave reviews, you're nothing but a supernatural dog and pony show. A metaphysical scam of Biblical proportions.
I'm in love with you Martha, and I know that must be hard to hear, even though I'm projecting my omnipotent voice clearly into your subconscious.
I understand that you're busy and all, but I just thought you should know that this 'plan' of yours pretty much blows! Leave shit alone down here!
Dear Humans, If you wouldn’t mind, could you please do me one favor: Stop yelling my name during sex. At first it was kind of flattering, but now it’s just ridiculous, and completely distracting.