Because We Care: Our New Corporate Wellness Program for Disgusting Pigs Like You
We care about your wellbeing because we don’t need your fat ass jacking up our healthcare costs.
We care about your wellbeing because we don’t need your fat ass jacking up our healthcare costs.
Q; What happened to Leonard? A: Leonard was catapulted through a vibrating and glowing door frame into a space between dimensions.
Air Max 180: You say stuff like, "The only way to be a marathon runner is to run a marathon." You've never run a marathon.
501-1000 likes: Your package will be delivered by dedicated Piper Cub and guarded en route by a contingent of off-duty Allstate Security agents.
Turning your art into a culinary brand doesn't always pan out. Just ask any soft serve operator at the now-defunct Dali Queen.
Who faced more adversity than when Elizabeth was defrauding people based on an invention that was scientifically impossible? No one, that’s who.
I “loved” your announcement on Facebook, and left a comment about how excited I am for you. > I find your friendship exhausting.
There's no curve in this class. Curves are “the hammock that lulls able-bodied students into dependence and complacency, draining their will.”
Sitting at a bar alone chewing mint gum while sipping a fruity drink is the ideal thing for a confident person to do at a party.
"Get Rich Media Banners or Die Tryin’" and "Jenny From the Blockchain": these are the kind of tunes best optimized for my life working here.
Having sex with my wife. She was planning to vote for Kamala Harris and not Beto prior to their sexual encounter.
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