Nappy Headed Snippets

Dave: What up, my nappy headed hos?
Me: Oh shit.

Erica: What'll it be Dave?
Dave: I would like a Budweiser please, you lil' nappy headed ho.
Erica: I'm not serving you if you keep saying that.
Dave: Fine, I'll stop saying "please", but you need to understand that I was raised to talk like this.

Erica: Why did Dave call me a nappy headed ho?
Me: It's the new thing. Don Imus said it on his radio show and got in a lot of trouble.
Erica: Who?
Me: Exactly.

Dave: I'm gonna get a T-Shirt made up that says, "Rutgers: Where all the Nappy Headed Hos Go."
Me: No you're not.
Dave: Maybe I'm not, then.

Erica: So this radio guy called an entire girl's basketball team a bunch of nappy headed hos and got into a lot of trouble for it?
Me: Pretty much.
Erica: So why's Dave keep saying it?
Tony: I can field this one, Mr. Nate. You see, Erica, Dave is what we in the field of professional psychology call, "Goofy."
Me: Like Disney times ten Goofy.
Tony: Motherfucker's goofy.

Dave (singing): I love my hos, my nappy headed hos. I love my hos, nappy headed where I goes. 'Cause where I goes, I need my nappy headed hos. They my hos? Where my hos? What kind of hos? My nappy headed hos.
Me: Did you write that?
Dave: Wrote, directed and produced right here on the spot in this here bar. What do you think about them writing chops, internet boy?
Me: You the man, Dave.
Dave: I'm the man, with nappy headed hos. I like my hos, all nappy to the floor, to the floor. Oh yeah my hos, my nappy headed hos?where y'all going?

Me: Did that Don Imus comment bother you at all, you know, since you're black?
Tony: I think what bothered me the most was the incorrect nature of the statement. I mean, the girls had their hair done up in braids. They weren't nappy headed.
Me: True. So then, the hos part didn't bother you?
Tony: Not really, they're all hos?

Dave: They may be hos, but that ain't all you know. They got to have the nappy head, if they be getting me in bed, 'cause I like my hos, my nappy headed hos. I take my hos, to the nappy picture shows. Where my hos? Who's got my nappy headed hos?
Me: Is it out of your system yet?
Dave: One more verse.

Dave: Al Sharpton's standing up for my hos, for my hos, 'cause Al knows, they the best hos if they tows, if they tows, them big ole nappy heads. Al's my friend, my nappy headed friend, and where he goes, he brings the fucking hos. My nappy headed hos. Oh yeah my hos, my nappy headed hos?
Erica: If you don't shut the fuck up, I'm banning you from here for life. Don't make me go crazy on your ass.
Dave: My bad, lil bartender girl. From now on, I will behave myself.
Erica: Good.
Dave: You know, your head ain't near nappy enough for me. You need to put some grease in there or something.
Erica: Get the fuck out.

Me: Bye, Dave.
Dave: Promise me you'll remember me. And everything I stand for.
Me: I promise, Dave.

Tony: What's he stand for, again?
Me: Hos, Tony. Nappy headed hos.
Tony: Right, right. I almost forgot.

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