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| Anonymous (not verified) | The title(s) alone made it a | I'm Here for the Gang Bang |
| Anonymous (not verified) | BTW...THIS COMMENT IS MOSTLY | How to Make Your Pussy Taste and Smell Better |
| Ryan H | Glad to see your radio show | Reasons I Smoke Pot |
| Serengueiro | haha, good observation | Why the Hell Does Columbus Get a Holiday? |
| Anonymous (not verified) | Great article. Funny as | The Five Stages of DUI Grief |
i really wish you could hear the message you left me. anyone know how to put a message on a computer file from a cell phone?
anyway, for everyone's reading pleasure, here's my word-for-word transcription of Gaudio's voicemail this night (picture a strong West Virginia accent to go with it):
COURT MAN, this is Gaudio. listen i wanna tell you a story aight. my friend was hittin on this bitch and he... SHE... was like... hittin on her and shit. she was like, "hey," and she was like, "hey can i get a ride home?" and we RAN FROM HER!!!
we were gonna re-enact it, but your dumbass is not picking up... and you are my editor and my brother... and i love you... with every ounce of my heart... shit... there's a red light...
LISTEN, gimme a call tomorrow and tell me this happened... because i'm soooooo fucked up right now... meditation and alcohol will fuck you up so bad... i'm so glad... i don't know.
[SCREAMING IN THE BACKGROUND] NOOO!! [INAUDIBLE SCREAMS] YOU'RE A NAIVE BITCH!! Listen we called her a dumb.... [YELLING TO SOMEONE] DRUUUUNK... ASSS HEEYY!!!
...ok, ill talk to you later cunt... court, HAHA
